BRIEF MENTION.

Marlborough Express, Volume XLIII, Issue 58, 4 March 1909, Page 5

BRIEF MENTION.

" A little nonsense, n9W and then, is relished by the wisest men."

March 4. Bom: Lord Chancellor Somers, 1652; James Earl Waldegrave, 1715. Died: Saladin, Sultan of Egypt and Syria, 1193; Bernard Gilpin, Protestant preacher, 1583. Saladin it was who overthrew the short-lived Latin kingdom of Jerusalem, and successfully bore the brunt of the third crusade. For preaching .the"doctrines or the Reformation, Bernard Gilpin was accused to Bishop Bonner. He was on his way to .answer the accusation when he broke his leg, and this accident •saved his life, as Queen Mary died before he had recovered.

We feel shame not for what we have done, but for what others know we have done.

Be good and you'll, be happy, but! you won't geY your •■ name in the I papers so often. , : "Pa, if a warship. is" called '.she.' why isn't it a woman-of-war? Father: "It's your bedtime, Willie." Learning without thought* is labour lost; thought without leaa-ning is perilous.—Confucius. ■ J No member of the British' Royal Family in the direct line can legally, marry without the consent of the Crown. Tommy, agsd six, who had ju&t been punished by his father: Mamma, I don't believe I can stand your husband much longer.

Eighteen tons of steel disappear daily on the London and North-West-ern Railway through wear and rust.

Nurse: Yes, we kept you alive for three weeks on . milk punch and brandy. Patient: Just my luclg and I was unconscious all that time.

A man who hadt successfully evaded the Bru'sselu police, for several days was detected by the loud isinoring which proceeded from an empty furniture van, in which he had taken refuge. '

Constable: Come along, you've got to have a bath. Tramp: A barf! What, with wiater? Constable: Yes, of course. Tramp: Couldn't you manage it* with one o' 'em vacuum cleaners? , .■■■'■■!■'

At the annual meeting of the Royal Humane Society recently the Stanhope gold medal and £5 for the best rescue of the year were awarded to William H. Parr for rescuing a. fel-low--seaman, on September 13, from the shark-infested waters of the River Inhambane,.East Africa. ■;'■■• "I thought, count,• yoii were a dead shot?". "lam-" "And yet; though you said you would shoot your adver-; sasry through the heart, you hit him in the foot?" "It was an error of judgment. I thought his heart wasi in his boots; it turned out to be in has mouth." ■

Mother: Just run upstairs, Tommy, and fetch baby's,, nightgoiwn. Tommy: Don't want to. Mother: Oh, well, if you're going to be unkind to your little sister v, she'may. put on her wings and fly back to heaven. Tommy: Then let her put on her wings and fetch her nightgown.

, I^,is estimated-.by the Jewish Year Book that there-"are 11,059,987 Jews in the 'world. Europe claims mtfa'e than any other .section of the globe., seeing that out of the gross total over eight and three-quarter millions reside on the Continent.. ; America comes ■^e^J:^ ]p-|h;f million and a-half, and 'Asia,' curiously , enough, nearly last with only 377,440.

A parson, seeing a lazy man standing idly a/t *the street corner, approachedl him, and said: — "Don't you know, my dear sir, that it is positively sinful t6.stand about wasting your time in'this manner?'*

The man replied: "Yes, I know it is, parson, and I'm going to stop it just a® soon as I find a comfortable place to sit down."

"Do you want a boy sir?" asked the applicant.

"Nobody," replied the merchant prince austerely, "wants a boy." "Do you need a boy, sir?" "Nobody needs a boy." "Do' you have to have a boy, sir?" said the applicant. "I fear we do." v

"I'm him," said the applicant, removing his jacket. "What do I do fir«t?'" . . .