BRIEF MENTION.

Marlborough Express, Volume XXXIV, Issue 220, 19 September 1900, Page 3

BRIEF MENTION.

«. Mablbobouqh'B Eunoiest smiles greeted thi Wellington visitors. Reminds them of Paradiee, they Bay. The Auditor and Controller-General if laid up with the " flue." No iespeoter oi persons. Wiedom is the knowledge of olhei people's mistakes. Don't begin building yoor hopes until you have made Bore of the Bite. Man clothed m a little brief authority is apt to find the ooat several sizeß too big for him. Two stores at Motueka are now receiving 2000 dozen eggs every week. A Bill to legitimate offspring of parents who subsequently marry is before the New South Waleß Parliament. Country roads m Obina are entirely ondefined. London baa ten thousand professional maßiaians. There were 11,607 foreigners settled m China m 1897. Oontßgions diseases kill 240,000 people ia France yearly, A Wellington dootor says the deaths of persona under chloroform averaged one m 3900. Medioal authorities were not yet agreed what the exact oausaof death m mo3t oases trader chloroform was. A post-mortem disclosed nothing. Kaikoura whalers landed a whale about 50 feet long the other day, the produot of which will repay the orew handsomely. The young man who is sowing hia wild oatß does not seem to understand the value of diversified orops. Clerk : " I've— er— had an addition to my family, sir." Employer (absent-minded) : " Addition ? Well, if it's correct, enter it m the ledger, Jones." The bill providing for a colonial scale of salaries for sobool teaobers is expected io make Hb appearance this. week. Bees are said to Bee an enormous distanoe. When absent from their hive, they go up m the air till they see tbeir bomp, i and then fly towards it m a straight line. Kansas has just gathered m her reoord harvest, namely, ninety million bushel b of wheat. Over twenty thousand extra men were employed at the work of harvesting. Straggling Minister: "There was a gtraoger m oburon to-day." Bis Wife; "Wbat did be look Ike?' Struggling Minister : " I did not see him, but I found a sovereign m the contribution box." Aocording to an Amerioan paper, the biggest rainfall on record, Binoe the period of the Flood, occurred at Mobile, Alabama, just rcoenily. In nine hours the rain-gauge registered 12£in, January and October of the same year alwayß begin with the same day. So do April and July, also September and Deoerafcer. February, Mauri), and November also begin with the same day. Customer : " This bullock's heart is very badly cooked." Waiter: " Well, sir, the cook's been orosßed m love, and, whenever he has anything to do with a 'cart it bo upsets him that ha doesn't know what he'b a» doin' of !" A Jewish distillery has been dedicated m Chiaago. In it wines for übb m the B ; nagogues will be made, and they are to be distilled from fruits and vegetables ; no grain can be ueed. Only Jews will be permitted to engage m (hair preparation. The following is a note reoenlly reoeived by a London health offioer from one of the residents of biß district:— Dear Si,—l beg to notify you that my ohild, aged six monthe, is suffering from measles as re« quired by Act of Parliament. 41 What is love?" queried the editor. He has einoe bean deluged with answers, mostly from the fair ccx. One lady Bays : " Love is an itching of the heart that we cannot get at to eorntob." A Canadian paper says: -"We do not claim to. ba tbe biggest printers and publishers m the world, but do olaim to have the biggest 'devil* m this country m our office. Hib name ie Robert Blanchard, and when he is m gcod trim weighs 27 stone. fle is only nineteen years old, and holds the medal for champion heavyweight bioycliet." A parcel of toys readied San Franoisoo from tha Blaok Forest. The consignment consisted of cats and dogs, warranted to make their natural noises. But a oareless workman executed a ourious nixing up m regard to the mechanism for producing scuod, with the result that the oanines mewed and the felineß barked. The toys have been sent baokto German?. *