SNAPSHOTS.

Lyttelton Times, Volume XCVI, Issue 11049, 29 August 1896, Page 6

SNAPSHOTS.

The Forcible Peebles, who are at present managing the bailking inquiry, have got the whole affair into a rut from which there seems no reasonable prospect of it ever getting out. Like the case of Jarndyce v. Jarndyce, it has become established, paid to expect it to move would be to court disappointment. It is true that the proceedings are still occasionally enlivened by sallies of humour, as when, for instance, Mr Seddon works off au epigram about Mr Hutchison and the Heathen Chinee, and the practice of law in China. But, for the rest, the affair has come to he taken on trust, and the details are passed by. A deadly monotony broods over the subject, and the head-line stands out drearily like a dilapidated Guy Faux, exposed on a deserted waste. The fact is that the Committee caused too much excitement at the outset. Like Lawson’s city of the old world it “ arose in storm to rot in a deadly peace.” Even Locksley Hall sixty years after must have been a gay locality compared to this inquiry chamber, where the members still aimlessly wrangle in the eternal round, where nothing ever happens, or is likely to happen, or is expected to happen, until the cud. * i'p *

The temper of the time is highly favourable to cranks of every tint and shade of lunacy, and a good number of high-class fads, run by people who may he described as cranks, more or less, are certain to bo launched in December. We are quite certain to hear from the faddist who believes in cold water as a beverage, and someone may be induced to come forward who believes the salvation of the country is dependent on Dr Ryder’s homoeopathic bread. Mr M’Donald, an advanced crank, has sailed for the colonies to advocate the general adoption of what may be euphemistically called the altogether,” and if he gets as ,far as Christchurch may be induced to stand for Parliament. On the other hand, certain under-garments have lately been described as essential to health, and somebody may be induced to come forward and advocate these against too apostle of nudity. Society,'according to Herr Teufelsdroch, sails through the Infinite ou cloth, but it might sail a good deal better on a patent, hygienic; bacteria-preventing under-gar-ment. The old-time panaceas of Statefarms, co-operative homes and inconvertible paper are getting a little played out. The intelligent working-man is on the look-out for something more advanced;

Turning from the remotely possible .to the actual, two, at any rate, ef the sitting members seem likely to have more than usual to say about themselves at election time. I refer to Mr Collins and Mr G. W. Eussell. These gentlemen have, not been “ dumb dogs ”; indeed, Mr Russell, when he comes to face the music, able to claim that he has said more in. less time than any other man in the House. It is not his fault that the woman lawyer and the woman M.H.E. have not yet arrived. Ho has made the Premier “sit up” more than once. He has laid the whole Government under a ban. He has run, full tilt at the effete institution which allows a few graduates to elect its governing body. Mr Collins, too, will be able to launch Ms nDivorce Bill at the tympanum of a listening public, and show how the white flower of a blameless life has always been the ideal of the . alleged representative of ■ the publicans and doubtful characters of the community. There would be. no more hanging if Mr Collins could have had his way. It is a little like legislating for the millennium, as Miss Jessie Mackay puts it, but still it is something. The elect of Eiccarton and the millennium member will have to be reckoned with in December. A millennium member, in particular, is not h thing to be lightly cast aside.

Mr G. J : Smith has been distinguishing himself, but in a rather peculiar way. He has shown how deeply sensitive conscious innocence or conscious wrong-doing—-whichever you please—can make anyone under the sting of rebuke. “ Desolation is a delicate thing,” but it is less delicate than the epidermis of Mr Smith. At this stage I should. like to record my opinion, amounting to conviction, that the honourable member protests too much. Any week last year it would havo been easy to collect a dozen- or so of criticisms levelled at the Hon J. G. Ward, any one of which was rather more offensive in its way than the particular criticism which has exasperated Mr Smith. A few of the Reeves commentators last election could also give the New Zealand Times man points in the way of how to do it. Take the case of that free and independent.critic* Mr George Hutchison. In the debate last ’Wednesday he observed that “ common dedenCy ought to have prevented the Premier bringing down such a proposal.” If the Premier and the Speaker between them have no objection to this, they could hardly go out of their way to champion the cause of Mr ’Smith. Another thing is that there is more in a name than some people imagine. With the vulgar it is commonly supposed that a high-sounding title and a sensitive nature go together. How, there is. nothing in the aggrieved member’s title that suggests any susceptibility to the crumpling of the roses. A “ casual contributor ” must be pardoned if he cannot discover the instincts of Vero de Vere under the name of George Joseph Smith. It is . taddeningv to-reflect how the com-, mercial instinct dominates all ranks of society and all conditions of life. The cricketer, for instance, is supposed to belong to a higher type than the professed turfite, and, if he happens to bo a member of an Australian Eleven, to be more concerned about drawing together the silken bonds of kinship than looking after the claims of lucre. But though the turfite may be reputed less respectable, the cricketer generally “ gets there all the same.” The Cricket Council in Australia wants the team to come home for the sake of the national pastime' and the gate money that might otherwise bo lost. The team decides that it will tour Hew Zealand for the good of cricket and the chance of adding to the English receipts. The Council is deeply aggrieved that the honour of Australia should be dragged through

the mud and a large number of shillings wasted. The party that comes out best seems to he the New Zealand Cricket Council, which is giving a large guarantee at considerable risk for the sake of the good that the raw provincials are likely to, derive from seeing the team in New Zealand. So it behoves everyone ’ who wishes well to a plucky venture to turn up and see what sort of a figure the Canterbury eleven, or forty-four, or whatever it may he, will cut against the visitors. Flaneur.