FREE AIR.

Horowhenua Chronicle, 11 September 1934, Page 3

FREE AIR.

"Look at the Siqueers over there quarrelling in their car. Fancy, they are such educated .people, too. Husband and wife are (both school teachers. "*

i i But they are not quarrelling. Why they are just talking normally.” “Ah, yes, but just listen. She drops an occasional ‘H’ or ‘O’ to annoy him, while he hurls split infinitives at her in every sentence. That is the way they fight.”

Tourist: “What a quaint little village you have. Truly, one half the world is ignorant of how the other half lives.”

Inhabitant: “Not in this village, mister, not in this village."

A man whose car somersaulted into a ditch after upsetting a vegetablebarrow, said that his mind was occupied with (business worries at the time of the accident. He certainly seems to have been turning things over.

“The trouble With my wife is that she never changes her mind,” said a man in court. He should try agreeing with her now and again.

“If you wash your face I'll give you a piece of chocolate," said grandmother, at the motor picnic. “And if you wash ‘behind the ears I’ll give you two pieces." “Grandma," replied little Johnny, “maybe I'd better have a swim."

Betty (at picnic, who has been served with a wing of chicken): “Mother, can’t I have another bit? This is nothing but hinges." » •:* - *

A man entered an hotel, litfng his

overcoat on a peg and pinned a card to it on which was written: “This overcoat belongs to a champion prize-fighter. Back, in ten minutes. ’ ’

When he returned the overcoat was gone, but the car was still there. To it had been added:

“Overcoat taken by champion longdistance runner. Won’t Ibe back at all.”

Tommy was being shown the two reservoirs, standing side by side. His mother explained to him that the water in the taps at home came from them. After a thoughtful pause, he asked, “Which is the hot one, mummy?”