FLASHES

Gisborne Standard and Cook County Gazette, Volume I, Issue 37, 6 September 1887, Page 2

FLASHES

Sir George Grey is being very well received on his stumping tour down South. The ■G.O.M. is speaking dead against Stont and Ballance, his old friends. Surely the Auckland Beil editor is going off his'heud. Thusly the other day, •• R a b. bits have been the true apostles of Liberalism —God bless the little bunny I May she be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it. Before her and her prolific offspring the squatters and the fend mono, polist must retire and smiling hjmeateade and happy families take thb place of bleating wethers.” . Fancy an intelligent man writing auen drivel. G. M. Reed is a talented man, bat when he gives forth such rot as the above, he wants muzzling or—a straight jacket. The New Zealand banka will not follow the Australian banks in the reduction of interest for some little time yet. Scene at a College examination. Professor 1 " Now Mr Z , please translate the phrase, “Da mortuis nil nisi bonutn." Mr Z—« " 0! the dead remains nothing but bones." The Wellington Frozen Meat Co. sent Home 50,000 sheep last year. For this season they have already made engagements for 100,000 sheep. ..... An Australian writes on education. Talking about music he says" Numbers of' boys and girls with ears square, trfengqlar, ears flabby and flapping, ears rlffilces and fatty I faces without mobility; eyes almost devoid oi expression and hands nearly jointless, and with an asinine development of tune are west* ing their time over the piano because fashion says children must learn music.” A good many of the same sort in this colony. The First Offenders' Probation Act Is work, ing very well, There are some 80 persoi I subject to its provisions, only thres or four ot whom have not fulfilled their pledgee. Says the Otago Educational Committee l» " The railing ol the school age to seven means " practically shutting up a number of country schools I" Hear, hear ; that is just what we have contended all along. . Dabby in Truth says:—" Prines Ferdinand is a poor weak, insignificant creature, who is about as well fitted to govern a country as a sickly black beetle." . Says the Auckland Star, “To raise the school age to seven would turn thousands of young children out of the schools, where they are trained to habits of order and discipline, into the gutters to swell the larrikin army. The totalisator is a “ fact " in thia Colony. £509,602 was put through fest year. In hard times careful people watch closely where they can buy best, and scan the advt< columns more closely. At no time is it more incumbent for tradespeople who wish to have success to keep their business notices before the readers of the popular papers. The moral of the last paragraph is " ad< vertise in the Gisborne Standard.

Spurious half sovereigns are in ciroulatlod in Wellington. Cash is evidently scarce arid a substitute has been, found. .

Says Sir Jooleyus: "To hear the objections made to the Midland railway one would think it was the intention of the contractors to cart the land and the railway away from the colony altogether. Three big wills Holloway's pills, three millions profit, Eno’s fruit salt, £600,000, Lea and Perrin’s Worcester sauce, £600,000. All done by advertising and don’t yen forget it I

It was a Geelong boy, who, when asked td name the five races ot mankind, said," Horse races, yacht races, foot races, boat races, and tail races.” He did the fastest time On record out of the school with the master after hint, “ Some newspaper men are never happy unless they are inventing some spiteful lid about an opponent ” says an American paper. That’s just what we think every time we read a leading article in the Poverty Bay Herald. Says Puff:—“Canada’s contribution to the Imperial Institute amounts to £20,000 f Is that much ? Ko, from five millions of people, and moat of 'em well in. its very little. They’re still trying to work up a subscription for the Ijnp. Inst, in Mel. bourne. Yes, some private people have taken it id hand there, and they will no doubt get their reward if they succeed; What more K.C.M.G’s.. That’s it my boy, blue and crlffiiwn ribbon is cheap enough." Bravo Dr. Barnardo I The plucky Londod phifentbrophist has now In his homes 2000 children, saved front the gutters of the modern Babylon. Says the Revd. Dr. Collyer " The Presd is the most potent power in the fend to-day. It unearthed fraud, exposed wickedness, and did noble work in grappling with sorrup. tlon."

The Imperial Institute is going to be the champion ugly building in London. The design is simply contemptible, and it is eondemned by nearly all the London papers which are not taken up with the snobbery, toadying gang who fawn upon Wales. Wholesale Jobbery is already talked of. Sir Dinshaw Monookjee Petel, a Bombay Partee, has given £15,000 for founding a female college. A printer in Canada, is said to be 103 years old- He has made so many typographical errors in his career that he is afraid to- dis. Ministers v. Editors. Larnaeh, Minister ot Mines, Is having a wordy warfare with Mr Twopenny, of the Otago Daily Times. The latter doesn't care a " twopenny ” d-—-n for Larnach’s slanging. Irish affairs to the front. Hartington IS said to strongly disapprove ol the fl:ur« the Government is adopting. Plainly the rotk the Tory Government will split on is the shamrock. Journalistic Amenities. Thus says th« Christchurch Telegraph 1— "Whenever the Lyttelton Times attempts to disease one economical question it gats terrible mixed. The result is very often that instead of prov. ing its own case it completely confirms the argument of its adversary.” ' The Government keep on jawing away about local industries, but'they're very inconsistent. 100 wire woven mattraates tot the Auckland Hospital were imported at a cost of £2 5s 6d each, when the same article, locally made, can be obtained for £2 de. The local Town Board are enraged with the Government becauee the metropolis ol Opotiki has not a letter carrier. Priestly ignorance and Priestly intolerance again. Barry, Bishop of Sydney, has petitioned Her Gracious to withold her assent from the recently passed N.B.W. Divorce Ex. tension Act. Why do not theee Bishops nind their own business ?

Auckland Calliope Dock nearly finished. Prepare for a five column whoop of joy and pride from the local busters. The cutter Venus, Captain Dowd, on her last trip from Gisborne to Auckland passed -he dead body of a man by the East Cape. Probably one of the Columbia's unfortunate crew.

Gisborne is not the only place where the mud reigns supreme in winter. Wellington streets are said to be in a terrible state of late.

The Fisk Singers are in Tasmania. The manager is still raking in hundreds of pounds from the pockets of the goody goodies for himself, and paying those poor darky girls 30 bob a week. Two hundred and sixty casks ot butter were sold in Melbourne the other day at two pence a pound. How handy it would have come in for the elections here. Candidates could have swallowed it all easily.