POSTSCRIPTS

Evening Post, Volume CXXXI, Issue 118, 21 May 1941, Page 6

POSTSCRIPTS

Chronicle and Comment

BY PERCY FLAGE

Hitler would love to be the modern hound of Crete—a smellful bloodhound. * * * * Fascist poster in Rome: : "Scratch an American and you'll find; a highway robber, pirate, and gangster." * * * Camou: Will it be Crete or indiscreet when Germany's air invasion is over and done with? * * * It can now be revealed, says "Bigger Ben," that the last thing played on the 8.8.C. theatre organ following a raid was the hose. . * * * Cavendish: Is it true that the quota of import licences for running shoes is to be increased to cater for a strong - demand anticipated at the end of the 1 year? * *--■*•-. ; SHAKESPEARE AND THE WAR. If you fight against God's enemy, , God will in justice ward you as his soldiers; , If you do sweat to put a tryant down, , You sleep in peace, the tyrant being \ slain; r If you do fight against your country's foes, Your country's fat shall pay your pains the hire. —"Richard III." * * * ; HAPPY HOENTING. ' He is Herr yon Hoenting—the Nazi . gentleman who is more or less N well f pleased with his Middle East labours , or. behalf of the Gestapo. In Syria , his agitation—showings of the Nazi | propaganda film "Victory in the West," and posters, "In heaven Allah is thy . ruler; on earth Adolf Hitler will rule ' us"—had fostered several bloody riots and a month-like strike. In Irak yon j Hoenting has done even better. I * * * MORE SIAMESE TWINS ; "Rory O'More" writes: "Here is a 1 follow-up of your story of the Eng and Chang story the other day":— Another pair of Siamese twins, Millie and Christine, were known as | the Two-headed Nightingale, because ~ one had a sweet contralto voice and ' the other a soprano. They were born in North Carolina in 1851. They [ could walk and run with facility, and j they'could dance on two or four legs with equal animation. These sisters differed in temperament and disposition. It was not unusual for them to quarrel, and when they did they , would knock their heads together. '** * ■ " JOKES AGAINST GERMANS. A German officer at Flushing asked ■ a boy whose was the statue near the mole of the harbour. The boy, a ' stutterer, replied: "It is m-m-m-rneant for Admiral de Ruyterl who d-d-d----defeated the English." The German of- ' ficer, suspecting an unfavourable allu- ■ sion, mimicked him sarcastically. • "S-s-^-so, is that Ad-m-m-miral d-d-d----de Ruyter?" Whereupon the boy re- | plied: "You'd b-b-b-better imitate him and n-n-n-not me." German anti-aircraft marksmanship seems not to be held in high esteem, , and the Dutch have a poor opinion of the "invincible"-German.-fighter-force. It is said that an English barrage-bal-loon floating majestically over Holland ; was shot at.by A.A. guns, but not hit. , Then, a squadron of German fighters > took off to shoot it down. They failed. t "And what happened to the balloon?" . "It burst from laughing." > # * * | THE ORIGINAL EATANSWILL. Four English towns claimed the honour of being the original of the "ancient, loyal, and patriotic" borough of ' Eatanswill, where Mr. Pickwick and 1 his party arrived during an exciting election contest between the Honourable Samuel Slumkey, of Slumkey Hall, and Horatio Fizkin, Esq.,' of Fizkin Lodge. These towns were Ipswich, Bury St. Edmunds, Norwich, and Sudbury, Research by Dickensians give preponderance to the claims of Sudbury. Dickens, while employed as a reporter on the London "Morning Chronicle," reported election meetings in January, 1835, at Ipswich and Sudbury. Perusal of these reports revealed that the account of the Sudbury election contains some of the' raw material worked up in the "Pickwick" chapters dealing with Eatanswill. Sudbury is 60 miles'from London, and has a population of 7000. It sent two members to the House of Commons from 1558 to 1867, but the election which the Pickwickians witnessed was apparently a by-election, as the contest was for a single seat. It was a byelection at Sudbury that, Dickens reported for the "Morning Chronicle" in 1835. Sudbury was disfranchised by the Reform Bill which Disraeli carried in 1867. w * * ADMONITION. Look here, Auld Muss! yer maister, Hit, Has curbed ye wi' the Nazi bit. Sac a' he does is pu' the reins Tae mak' ye dae what he ordains.; Yince on a time ye were top-dog When Hit was jist a wee green frog Croakin' an' loupin' in a ditch Plagued wi* his funny Nordic itch. Noo ye're richt underneath his thumb, A' ye can dae is jist sing dumb, Except, when much tae my surprise, I hear ye tell great thumpin' lies. Ye mak' it plain we hae D.T.s, For ye see ships sail on the seas Which hae "hae bottoms, sides, or lums,. Nor aeroplanes for aerial scrums. These phantom ships at yince ye sink A' in the twinklin' o' a wink. Six times the big Ark Royal ye've sunk. That proves tae me that ye are drunk. Joe Goebbels boasts a bigger scoreHe sank her twenty times before. . . , If Hit should ring ye up an' speir What I've been sayin'. mak' it clear— A "bird" has flown frae "Adolf's Ark"— It's no a dove —it's jist—A LARK! CROWBAR. * * * WORLD-TO-BE. Dear Percy Flage,—l read with interest yet another inspiring treatise on this "Great Change," and "New World Order" of which we have all heard so much, and about which we really know ,so little. Feeling in a suitably righteous frame of mind, I allowed pleasant, if a little vague, ideas of this new world-to-be ol peace and good will to meander aimlessly around my brain, until suddenly occurred - the startling and disillusioning thought: How do we start? When? Where? There must be some starting point. There must be - some foundation upon which-may be built this new "World Structure." And if we are to tell the world; how many languages would we have to learn before these ideas, could be placed in comprehensible form before the "unecicated forriner"? That is the reason that nearly ten years ago I began learning the neutral international ,' language. Esperanto, upon which is built our hope of the new World Order, It is', wonderful'to dream, but feo much more wonderful to prepare. Many thanks to Hune for her epistle which inspired 'Ms article. Best wishes to the column which tempers^ its humour with gems of• serious merit. N.H.