SHE WAS IGNORANT, TOO.

Evening Post, Volume CVIII, Issue 120, 16 November 1929, Page 21

SHE WAS IGNORANT, TOO.

The doctor had been to see-Mr.'Brown, and on leaving said: "Now, Mrs. Brown, your husband has been very ill, and I want you to give him his medicine in a recumbent posture." After the doctor had gone Mrs. Brown said to herself,-"Recumbent posture, recumbent posture! I 'aven't got one. I wonder if Mrs. Jones will lend me hers.'' So she went to the back fence and called — Mrs. Jones, the doctor says me 'usband as to take his medicine in a recumbent posture, but I 'aven't got one; will you lend me yours?" .' " ' "Oh," replied Mrs. Jonea, not wishing to show her ignorance, 'Tin so sorry, Mrs. Brown; I 'ad one once, but it got broke."

First Chorus Girl: This article says that one's looks are determined by one's diet. Her Rival: Then if I were you I should stop taking plain foods.

Friend: "Have you sold anything since you started painting?" Artist: "Only my best suit and most of the furniture."

He: "What-"yould you think if I were to steal just one little kiss?" She: "Fathead! What would you think of a burglar who had a chance to steal a hundred pounds and only took a penny ':"

Proud Father: "My son is taking languages at his college." "How do you know?" "I got a bill for £5 yesterday for Scotch."

Billy had been told that a tradition is something handed down from parents to children. ■ So the next day at school he explained to his teachV- that he was late because "Mother had to mend my traditions."

Magistrate: "Were you ever arrested before?" Prisoner: "Once before, your Honour." "What was the charge?" "Ten shillings and costs."

Merchant: "Leave your sample case at the door." Traveller: "Why?" Merchant: "Otherwise I shall have that to throw out as well."

The ' successful candidate had just appeared. A crowd of excited men surged round him, lifted him shoulder high, and jostled him along the street. "Thanks so much, my friends," said the successful- candidate, "but pleaEe let me down: I'd much rather walk to my car." "Car be blbwed." shouted back one oE those -who bore him onwards, "it's the canal you're going to."

'"Look at that foolish fellow Robinson," said one man to another. "Out on a rainy day like this.without an umbrella! Is he mad?" _ "I suppose so," said his friend, hurriedly- 'Let's go on. I don't want to meet him. "Why not?" "Because he might recognise this umbrella.- It's his!"