ONLY ME.

Evening Post, Volume LXXVII, Issue 133, 12 June 1909, Page 10

ONLY ME.

During the recent election a man walking along a quiet street was startled to see a house door suddenly opened, and a man fall bumping down to the sidewalk. Picking him up, the pedestrian asked what was the matter. "That's my club in there," said the human projectile. "It's a political club ; there are nine Jones men, and I'm for Smith . They threw mo out. But don't worry. I'm going in and clean 'em all out. You stand here and count 'cm." In he went, and sure enough, in a minute the door burst open, and a figure cleared the feteps without touching. "One!" said the spectator, holding up a finger. "Hold on!" cried the prostrato ojia; "don't begin to count, yet. This ia only me again !"

An enterprising n«w»pa.per reporter who once happened to bs holidaying at th« same* seasido resort as Lord Northcoto took the occasion by tha hand by asking for some advico on a policy his paper proposed to adopt. "Advice lam always chai-v of," said his lordship. "It ueo cheap, so easy. I remember eomo years ago watching a boy pushing a heavy oarfc up a hill. The hill was steep : tliH boy thin. He bent forward at tho work till ho was almort horizontal. 'Push it up zig-zag,' I cried, 'and you will find that it will go much easier.' The boy snarled Back : 'Not co much of yer bloom.' n 1 advice. Come and give'a a, sh&Y.a. 1 '.'-