CUPID AND THE GAS

Dominion, Volume 10, Issue 3137, 16 July 1917, Page 6

CUPID AND THE GAS

A PSYCHOLOGICAL MOMENT

(By "Wi.") You never miss the water till the well runs dry. Tell that estimable, higUyrespectable, and thoroughly domesticated citizen, Mr. John Toiupkins, that ten thousand hapless, unfortunate Armenians havo been massacred or tortured in fifty different fiendish ways by tho Turk, and you will observe ii pained expression on Iris face. "Dear, dear!" he will say. "Terrible! terrible!" He really means'it, and is gennincly distressed about it—for about fifteen minutes. Then ho becomes absorbed in the pursuit of wealth and forgets all about it. Tell him, if you like—which is rjuito true—that if the Empiro doesn't keep up its strength on til!) battle fronts he will wako up some lino day and see a pickelhaube outside, his bedroom window, and several more in the middle distance. In all earnestness he will listen to you, and probably discuss the question of stirring up public opinion with a letter to a news, paper. Ho will even fork out a year's subscription for some kind ot league tho which to sustain and propagate the argument And ho will forgot all about that, too. But let him go forth from his warm bedroom to tho southerly draughts of the back door and find the jug full of emptiness instead of milk, let him find the water turned , off at tho meter before lie has shaved and bathed, let his 'phone get out of order when ho wants Iho doctor, let tho gas expire in the pipes just as the chops are placed on tho grill, let some low sneak pinch the morning paper from liie verandah, and seo what happens to Mr. John Tompkins. Ue seethes, lie orupts, he hits tho Toof. Such, is Iris state of nurnl that ho is capable of doing to the milkman what tho Turk did to tho Armenian. Ho would havo the City Corporation led forth to the rack and tho thumb-screw whilo he stands apart with folded arms, lickiu" his chops as he regales his bloodlust lit the spectacle. He would go down to tho telephone exchange with si meatchopper in his hand and murder in his heart. He wonid make tho employees and directors of tho Gas Company walk tho plank. . All these- because Mr. John Tonipldns is only human, like you and me. Oh, yes—like you and me! Take the moto out of your eyo and look in tho The only way to make Mr. loin p. kins-aiid you and ine-sit up and tako notice is to hit us where we'll ieet it most. Then—by gum! 'Tis an ill wind that blows nobody good. Consider the strike at tho gasworks. Tho oil, candle, and stovo business will get a boost, and Carissima Daley will get a husband who will remember the gas strike all the days of his life. Whether ho will live to curso ' the strike is a matter between him and his Carissima. . His name was George. A laggard in love was George. As Carissima's ma put it one night when she looked at the itas bill he was too slow to catch worms. When George fell in love with Carissiuia lio immediately shrank into his shell. Some men are like that. Their L'ersonal shortcomings snddemy assume lrighttnl proportions and they flee, from themselves, forgetting that since love is blind, tho blindness is on both sides. George's devotion took tho shape of iormal calls, occasional jaunts to the Baj, an evening at the pictures, and then vome to a full stop. Thus far would ho come, and no further, and Carissima s honeyed disposition developed ft subtle ""Some" girls/would have given it up and thrown themselves into the arms ot some swash-buckling dare-devil as an antidote to their overwrought nervos. i\oi so Carissima. You sec, George was <i decent sort. Away from Carissima ho was as good a man as he next, and she knew it. In the parlour, alone villi her, his tongue clave She knew wat he wanted to say, but, well-there >on are Girt up in the armour of maidenly modesty, slio waited for the psycholocical moment. „ "Carissy," her ma had said, novel mal<e yourself cheap to a man.' And -.CaTissi'ma didn't intend to. Then tho men at tho gasworks went or. strike. . . . George came along one evening jusc after tea to tako Carissima to the piclures. He sat in the parlour, twiddling his cap. while Carissima got ready Presently she came, gloved, itatted, and, it Gcorgo could havo said it, looking as ■sweet as a nut. "Ready?" she smiled at mm. George made a noise' in his throat. "Just help me on with my coat, she <=aid. (N.8.-This little dodge goes back to the timo when Eve got her first coat.) George put down his cap, look hold ot the co"at as if ii: were n rare rrchid, mid dizzily draped the collar round her "It'this bright particular moment the "as went out. Carissima gave a little gasp, clutched at her cavalier, Cupid lauehod, and Well, you don't want to know any 1 more, do you?