UNCLE GEORGE.

Cromwell Argus, Volume XLIII, Issue 2287, 4 March 1912, Page 7

UNCLE GEORGE.

HIS PICTURE OF A MODEL HUSBAND. Uncle George was reputed to be rich, and was known to be irascible. It cannot be said that he had a happy manner, but, for the sake of the favours which might follow his death, this failing was overlooked. "How d’ye dc*, Martha ? That fat of yours isn’t health —it's blubber. "How d’ye do, Tom? I see you’ve been wasting your money on a new kitchen range. You’d far better have a penny-in-the-slot gas machine.” "How d’ye do, Emily ? Why didn’t you take your chances of marrying when you had them ? You’re beginning to show your age.” "How d’ye do, Tilly? That young feller come up to the scratch yet ?” "Which one?” asked Tilly pertly. "It doesn’t matter which one,” said Uncle George, "so long as one has. In my young days we didn’t have all this dilly-dallying and shil-ly-shallying. Young men chose their wives and married them out of hand.” "I thought you didn't approve of matrimony, Uncle George,” laughed Tilly. "No more I don’t for myself,” replied Uncle George. ’’’But while the world lasts there’ll be fools In it, and those fools ’ll want to marry. The sooner they do it the better, I say. . . . Now, I've found a good husband for you, Tilly, my girl. He’s got enough,” he added solemnly, “to make any woman happy. And he's looking for a wife.” ‘"Emperor of Japan ?” suggested Tilly flippantly. Uncle George threw a resentful look at her and went on “He’s a deep-sea diver, that’s what he is, and that being a dangerous occupation, he makes a pot of money by it. Besides which, his mother's just died and left him a thousand pounds and shares in a drapery business in Stockport. He’s got a snug little house. Also, he’s bought a grand piano and an Axminster carpet, not to mention a gramophone and a mangle. He’s, asked my advice about choosing a wife, and I’ve suggested you.” “Me ?” echoed Tilly. “Why not? You’re a handy little thing—a bit too free with your tongue, perhaps, but he’ll soon teach you to keep your place.” "Thanks, I’m not taking any,” said Tilly brusquely. But visions of the house and the Axminster carpet and the grand piano rose alluringly before her eyes.—Gertrude M. Poxe, in the “‘Pall Mall Magazine.”