IT ISN’T CRICKET

Press, Volume LXXVIII, Issue 23587, 14 March 1942, Page 6

IT ISN’T CRICKET

♦ [By WHIM-WHAM.J "At the moment the Empire team is batting on a sticky wicket and the Axis fast bowlers have had some sue cess. Our best bats have still to go in and score. . . ."—Message to Austrails from the Dominions Office. If War were like Cricket, and all A Matter of playing the Game With Willow and Wicket and Ball, With a similar innocent Aim; If piling up Runs Were the Purpose of Guns; If the direst of Hits That a Bomber could score Were a Six or a Four, And Bodyline Bowling a BlitzYes, granted all This, It might not be amiss, No, it mightn’t be Nonsense to say That the Wicket is sticky, The Bowling is tricky, In the Match with the Axis to-day! But War isn’t Cricket—Oh, no! Oh, War isn’t Yorkshire v. Hants, When all of the Slips Carry Guns at their Hips, . Yes. Tommy-guns strapped to their Pants! You may call it a Fast or a Slow, The Ball that a Bomber sends down: But a Bomb is a Thing With a deadlier Swing Than Any the Oval has known! Such curious Cricket was never Enjoyed in the oldest of Schools. It’s a Game where the Players endeavour _ , (Not flannelled, and surely not Fools!) To knock up a Million While in the Pavilion The Devil’s rewriting the Rules!