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Bruce Herald, Volume XI, Issue 1078, 14 January 1879, Page 3

Two ladies, arrayed in the full breadth of fashion when the crinoline was in vogue, were walking in tbe country not far from Blairgowrie, and not being sure as to the '* right of way " on a certain road, asked a rustic labourer if they could get up that way ?" The simple fellow looked at the fair ones, and considering it was a question of girth, re plied : " I dinna ken ; but tbere waa twa load of bay gaed up a whyle syne." Tbere was once an Aberdeenshire miniate** , whose livelong peculiarity it was, that he could never get an egg boiled hard enough to suit bis taste. " Well, is your egg boiled hard enough tbis morning, Sir ?" said bis man to him one morning at breakfast. " Oh, no ; not nearly hard enough John," was the reply. " Then, I dinna ken how we can ever contrive to please you, sir," said the servitor ; " for that egg that you're eating has been on boiling a' nicht wi' the horse meat." General Stirling, who rose from tbe ranks, established himself, on his retirement from the army, in his native town of Musselburgh. At a public dinner the toast of his health was proposed by one of his old acquaintances. *• 1 remember the general," said the speaker, "when he was hurlinga barrow fu' of turnips." " If I bad possessed your brains," interrupted the general, who disliked such personal allu sions to his early liV "I won'd have been hurling turnips yet."