THE PASSING SHOW.

Auckland Star, Volume LVII, Issue 250, 21 October 1926, Page 6

THE PASSING SHOW.

(By THE MAN ABOUT TOW*. j|

A CREAKING EMPIRE. French ears listen for wla t _, of their newspapers calls "the cr«Vi!_s of the structure of the BrithhES —(Extract from leader.) pTO * Oh dear, -he Empire's falling & 0 ~-. The foreigners have done ns wsl Half-mast the Flag, call on? th» l* 1 All things are bat and wffl be *££• ) The Yanks have rookpri ns *«_ Of Chinamen we're all &$ °« *»«,. Look how the Germans get alone Bin g ! There's the My word, let's weep and wall a** _ Oh. lachrymae I Let's all maW « oia t Although we've nearly alway*fS Let's fold our hands/and leTs do^aught The sky Is one black dismal clonfl Oh. wail like blazes, waff g 0 iXi For foreigners all think .we ought (The wish is father to the S^t) The Old Land's going to the does Coal strikes and doles and gloom an* . _ .Not a blue bean within itsCiT ** Except twelve hundred ,___„, poundi ] A million smoke stacks pierce the riri- 2 One hundred million earnest eves 4 One hundred million skilful hands' I Are toihng. Won't they understand* 1 That now's the time to fold their ha»j,. ,' ™V v< ; HS. trad . c t0 other Oh dear! Oh mc! Oh dear! Oh hell I ' Throw in the towel, we may as wen. a Buck up, oh snivelling hypocrite, 4 Bog in and do your little bit S Dry those red eyes with teardrops w»f 1? The Empire shall be greater yet ft ENGLAND EXPECTS.

There may be those who do n_ remember that this is the anniversarY of the greatest day in the history of tht British Empire. October 21 IMS settled for us the maritime sspremacr of Great Britain. It i B because of Nelson and Trafalgar that we are here! In a very special sense New Zealand people should reverence the Kelson tradition because these islands can never remain ours unless the Nelson tradition is maintained. Maybe some day fees* islands will become the chopping block for large axes, and it will be useful then to be sailorly.

Without being sloppy none of mi should ever be able to see a bluejacket without remembering what he means to us. The Navy feeling was strengthened in New Zealand by the presence at Governor-General of the Empire's greatest sailor, the modest gentleman who did his job and shut up as long ai he could. This day, in a lesser sense, is of importance to New Zealand, because it was on October 21, 1899, the first THiw, Zealand troops to go on foreign service left Wellington.

This small body of selected mounted riflemen put in parts of three yean of extremely strenuous life in South Africa, being fortunate enough to earn the applause of those whose applause w»j best worth earning. To-night in Wei. lington and in Auckland the survivori meet at dinner.

VERSENKT. It seems almost incredible thai Mr. Wilhelm Hohenzollern should have to stay in Holland when he wants to go • back to Germany. A few years ago, with a wave of his royal hand, he could fill a town with fragments of women and children and call himself a partner of the Deity. He is tired of "the intolerable Dutch climate," and the intolerable Dutch are obviously tired of him. although they have to keep him. One of course is not silly enough to believe that Wilhelm has ever been anything but an intolerably vain person, who by accident was the head of a superior system of lunacy. As all alienists agree that paranolacs should be humoured, if they could rush Wilhelm to the frontier not and again and get a few large sergeant* majors to shout "Hoch der Kaiser!" the poor old thing might become reconciled to the intolerable Dutch climate.

BLACK OUTLOOK. Competent alienists should rail from all parts of the Empire to Southern Rhodesia and insist on strong quarters for the Rev. W. A. Cotton. He is tie person who has written a hook which advisee Christians to accept "race fusion over large areas." One would, of course, like to see the large area over which tie rev. gentleman has been operating. But if Mr. Cotton happens to have any danghtes for whom he has any affection, »nd offered them, say to a Zulu, a Matabele, or a Bushman (any of whom will givs him up to ten bullocks for a good working wife), one would conclude that 1« really meant what he speaks of. This preposterous person, who is the type tf hosts of other preposterous persons, suggests a new career for our girls. Tie races with which he desires our girls to fuse still consider the woman a chattel A rich black may have as many wives as he likes, so one suggests that followers of the rev. gent (one can hardly call him "a reverend gentleman") could dispose of a whole family of white girls to a single Zulu gentleman. On tfe« other hand, knowing that the war ded» mated white men and left a preponds* ranee of women, what a glittering thought it is for a real clergyman to send his white brothers into the kraals to gather up black wives. If the rev. gent has any influence with his brother clergy he might induce them to sacrifice them' selves on the altar of duty by giving us a lead and offering their hands, hearii, and expectations to kaffir belles.

SHOULD A DOCTOR TELL?

Doctors disagree at Home as *» whether they should write for the Pre«They appear to agree that it is not nice to advertise. You could hardly expect a grave M.D. belonging to the solemn B.M.A. advertising, "Wanted by qualified medical practitioner ctwes ° appendicitis, sinovitis or elephantiasis' Lowest cash prices. Reductions for quantity.—Apply X.Y.Z." It's not done. But if doctors are to write »> r the Press, why ail that recent fuss about tennis players who were a» qualified because they wrote about t» game? What's the matter with tie good old fashion of telling it a-il to » journalist ? A man is either one thug or another—say a poor doctor and* 2ood journalist, or a good doctor and* bad journalist. Some doctors wnte well. One would never go to such a on« to be denuded of an adenoid or to have a leg removed. Perhaps medical persons sometimes exaggerate the fearful things that would happen if they hecanw advertisers. Pome medical persons usw to advertise in Australia. It unhappy happened that they were not P ar ? lC "' larly respectable, but they would nw been no more respectable if they' not advertised. Whatever the m«lica men do or do not do the newspapers w remain the greatest medium for tion in public health. One has a. leewi that much of the medical talk u> «* papers which specialise in «f c {* human beings to be people is person? who have never walked tals. Personally one will never can the journalist in a case of consult the doctor as to the fortaw Bt "» issue of a newspaper. v *