All Sorts

New Zealand Tablet, 12 May 1910, Page 758

All Sorts

In the production l of olive oil Asiatic Turkey leads -with Spam second, and Italy third. ’ w;iil e Vi ‘ Now ’ ildren 1 suppose you all know that afternoon P’ 6 8 Papa 18 golllg to address the school this Jimmy Jenkins: ‘ Yes’m. I told my pa about it, too,’ Teacher : Indeed; and what did he say ?’ an envelope. ” 6,nkinS ' ‘ He Said ’ “ Why he can’t address Old gentleman (proposing health of happy pair at the wedding breakfast) :‘ And for the bridegroom, I can speak with still more confidence of him, for I was present at his christening, I was present at the banquet given in honor of bis coming of age, I am present here to-day, and I trust i may be spared to be present at his funeral.’ A school teacher having instructed a pupil to purchase a grammar, the next day received a note thus worded from the child s mother: r Jdo not desire for Lulu shall ingage in grammar, as i prefer her ingage in yuseful studies and can learn her how to speek and rite proper myself. I have went through two grammars and I can’t say as they did me no good. I prefer her ingage in german and drawing and vocal music on the piano.’ Mrs. Brown ; ‘So poor old Jones is gone at last ; consumption, the doctor said it were.' Mrs. Green:- ‘That’s strange; there never Avere any consumption in the family as rj- heard on. Mrs. Brown : ‘ Oh! that don’t make no difference. My sister’s ’usband was carried off by gastric fever, and they never had no gas in the house at all; they always burned paraffin.’ . - ‘ ’ J A short time ago the superintendent of a ‘ model farm ’ as explaining the working of an incubator to a class of young ladies. At the end of the lesson she told them to ask any questions they liked if they did not fully understand her. Imagine her astonishment Avhen one of the girls, with an earnest look of inquiry on her countenance, put the question, And where does the hen sit?’ The study of the occult sciences interests me very much, remarked the professor. ‘ I love to explore the dark I depths of the mysterious, to delve into the regions of the I unknown, to fathom the unfathomable, as it were, and I to- ’ May I help you to some of the hash, professor interrupted the landlady. And the good woman never knew why the other boarders smiled audibly. A newspaper reports an exchange of civilities between two artists. ‘ Well, old man,’ said one, ‘how’s business?’ Splendid!’ said mimber two. ‘l’ve just got a commission from a millionaire who w r ants his children painted very badly.’ ‘ Good! I congratulate you, my boy. You’re the very man for a job like that.’

The first foot coverings were sandals. After these came shoes left open at the toes, then the wooden shoes of the ninth and tenth centuries, followed a little later by shoes with long-pointed and turned-up toes, which sometimes reached as high as the knee. Later a shoe was worn with an exceedingly wide toe, so very wide that it impeded the process of walking. Queen Mary restricted the wearing of this by proclamation. The proclamation ran to the effect that shoes should not be worn wider than six inches. A hotelkeeper near New York City is a Frenchman and Ins family know little more about English than he does. His suburban hotel stands in the centre of a square filled with large trees. When the proprietor wanted to call attention to this advantage he put on his cards ‘ The most shady hotel around New York.’ The reputation of the place is beyond reproach, and the proprietor does not know yet why so many persons smile when they read the line quoted.

Eighty, years ago the etiquette of letters was far more rigid than now. Even the twopenny post was not considered good enough for correspondence addressed to persons of any standing. In her Reminiscences of an Octogenarian Miss Louisa Packe tells us that when her father had occasion to write to Londoners in his own class of life the letter was always conveyed by a servant not for any reasons of urgency, but because the post was considered a vulgar medium of communication for persons residing in the same city and only to be used for the conveyance of letters to the country.

The stoat is the commonest and most widely distributed of all the weasel tribe. Like the rest of the family, it is most bloodthirsty, and often appears to kill for mere’ sport and pleasure, it is the deadly foe of all small animals, from the li are to the smallest field-mice. Oases are on record however, where a mother rabbit defending its young has driven an attacking stoat away. The stoat is very fond of its joung, and in times of danger will carry them to a place of safety, as a cat carries its kittens, by the scruff of their necks. They do great execution among young pheasants and partridges. They can climb well, and are known to ascend trees and kill birds on their nests. They also suck eggs, causing serious loss to rearers of game.,