AMERICAN HUMOUR.

New Zealand Tablet, Volume XIV, Issue 44, 25 February 1887, Page 13

AMERICAN HUMOUR.

tha HAH A f PB f^ TTY New York female thief disguised herself as a man and - the detectives were unable to find her because she had schooled' ££ window!* 88 a ffiilliDery St ° re WithoUt 8t °PP in g to pee°p Ol S hheh t ece h r ; '■ B«»P UriD E tb f bolera epidemic in Nashville, Term., the late Dt Bow ing attended an old blind negro, who eked out an existence by playing the flute at the street corned. He recovered, Vnd w7th a heart bldroZ l^ W h tb gra , titl l de he took his flute an(i sat °°der the dwtor'fl bedroom window and played it the whole night long. wnr^ 0 v 'I the ben « factorß of the human race ?" thundered the hat Z '<? h \ mght his hand dOWD U P° D fche defi k with a thump that made a water spout rise out of the pitcher : " who are tKe benefactors of the human race I ask ?" in a backseat 1 ' 111 ° f >em '" Baid a ""le squint-eyed man, rieing 'to inqm>e c ? tUrer WSS rathel " taken &h *° k ' but after a P aufie he managed j " And what have you done— built a railroad ?" No, sir, I've invented a bed.bug poison " ' laughter. lGCtUrer BmUed * 8i ° kly Smile and the audience ro «ed with i __ ____ she wa^^ayng 7 ** *""* eveQin « 8 ' ? " a " k^ a of a new girl „..'! Oh) y eß>m< In ever y evening in the week except Sundays and i She was not engaged. We mS y h^ i&ter - Conducto , r > J wißh you'd let this train halt up a bit, mus a gwine ten miles an hour, an 1 hits pow'f ul danjus." At the present time," said the conductor, calmly takine out his "F-f- forty-f-f.fi yeP bemaSig^-fi^ I Baid the cond « ct or, « pretty soon we will Bay ! Jewnillikens ! Le' me off ! Le' me off, " Let you off — why ?" j "Why-why? Well, wunst I heerd the keers was a carrolin 1 1 " Oh," said the conductor, " that was a " " I km whup yo'l'" ! " What for ? ' i " Pur that accident, b'gosh." proudM^^-s"^^ famUy?"" * ° f fiV6 ° n M 8 I&P ' "" e '°* the °wS? of the nV I nHH NHN H ma ' am -", responded the little miBS with the accuracy of childhood, " my pa's older'n me.-^. Paul Herald. * in trnnt 0 Ot ™T dvm P ed almost simultaneously yesterday n front of two lawyers' offices in Griswold-street, and one of the brgTnrupthTcoaf. Vißit6d a yy ° Ung maQ Wh ° B ° licited tt'JobS " How much ?" was the cautious inquiry. "Fifty cents." " Too much," " Well, say thirty-five." la-t basSiffihe 3 la^Sd? """' "*** h " Cam 6" P With th ° " See here, Mister, I've had a dozen offers since you began work to have that coal brought up for a quarter. Your figure is Too hS." I knew you d say that," replied the man, » and so » lou 11 make it a quarter ?" thingstvenr 1 ' 76 br ° Ught yy ° U Up a ' m ° St half tbe other P ile to make f v T i Q 2f2 f V eT looked out and Baw that il waß a fact, and he cheerfully handed over the the price agreed upon.