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’Twas not for want of breath he died, But rather that he misapplied The ample breath he had, I wot. Before he went to bed that night He witlessly blew out the light. The gas escaped; the man did not. * * * * They dined all alone at 8:8. On oysters they dined and 8.8, And he asked his dear K 8 To tell him his f 8 When they 8 tB-a-t8 at 8:8. » * * * Soon after the Civil War, General Ingalls, U.S.A., visited a friend in the South. Taking a walk one morning he met a boy coming up from the river with a fine string of fish. “ What will you take for your fish?” asked the general. “ Thirty cents,” was the reply. “Thirty cents!” repeated the general in astonishment. “ Why, if you were in New York you could get three dollars for them.” The boy looked critically at the officer for a moment, and then said, scornfully: “ Yes, suh; er, I reckon if I had a bucket of water in hell I could get a million for it.” * * * * “ Mama, did you love to flirt when you were young ?” “ I am afraid I did, dear.” “ And were you ever punished for it mama?” “ Cruelly, dear. I married your father.” * * * * The following story is told by the Chinese Minister at Washington: “ There was a Chinaman who had three dogs. When he came home one evening he found them asleep on his couch of teakwood and marble. He whipped them and drove them forth. “ The next night, when he came home, the dogs were lying on the floor. But he placed his hand on the couch and found it warm from their bodies. Therefore, he gave them another whipping. “ The third night, returning earlier than usual, he found the dogs sitting before the couch blowing on it to cool it.”

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https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/periodicals/NZISDR19071224.2.21

Bibliographic details

New Zealand Illustrated Sporting & Dramatic Review, 24 December 1907, Page 16

Word Count
305

Untitled New Zealand Illustrated Sporting & Dramatic Review, 24 December 1907, Page 16

Untitled New Zealand Illustrated Sporting & Dramatic Review, 24 December 1907, Page 16