COME HOME, FATHER.

New Zealand Illustrated Sporting & Dramatic Review, Volume XIV, Issue 819, 16 November 1905, Page 25

COME HOME, FATHER.

Father, dear father, come home with me now

For mother is out to the club ; You said you were coming right home from your work To get the dear children some grub. The cook has gone out ; her club also meets ; The janitor’s gone on a spree ; And poor brother Bennie has swallowed a nail. And no one to help him but me.

Father, dear father, come home with me now ; There s scrubbing and sweeping to do; While mother is solving the problems of state The children are crying for you. The. socks must be J| darned, the patches tacked on, The beds must be turned back to air ; And mother’s shirt-waist must be ironed to-night Or she will have nothing to wear. Father, dear father, come home with me now ; It’s lonelv without any man ; And mother will grieve when she comes from the club If things are not fixed spick and span. Don’t swear, dear papa, it isn’t polite ; The children in hearing might be So let business slide, for dear mother, you know, Might bring home a few friends to tea. DUNCAN AT. SMITH.

Three thousand gallons of water are conveyed by rail from Steaford to Surfleet (Lincolnshire) twice a week for the use of a brewery. The local river is impregnated with salt.

In the country districts of Kent hopheads are largely eaten, when in the early part of the season, the superfluous shoots are cut away from the plants. It is said they make a delicious dish and possess certain highly beneficial properties.

The following table of weights is very useful :—Two ounces, are equal to six pennies or ten shillings in silver ; one ounce to half the above ; half-an-ounce to two and sixpence in silver, or one penny and one ; a-quarter of an ounce to one and threepence in silver, or one threepenny bit and a halfpenny.