The Matrimonial Pessimist.

New Zealand Graphic, Volume XLVIII, Issue 7, 14 August 1912, Page 11

The Matrimonial Pessimist.

(By

LEWIS ALLEN.)

IT the average woman thought hetf husband didn’t love her any more thaw she loved him, she'd be heartbroken. Home is too often where one is nos allowed to make himself at home. If the roosters as well as the chickens would come home to roost it would be a happier world. I knew a husband and wife who were supremely happy—but they weren't married to each other. There was never a coquette but what finally got married—or wished she had. A Miss is as good as a Mrs. Married men think she is better. Do the friends of the bride sob with envy, and of the groom snicker in derision? Dove knots, beau knots, matrimonial knots, then little what-nots. Slow husbands are apt to make fast wives. It isn’t much worse io marry for money and divorce for love than to reverse the programme. If a man cannot get a few snilies at his home he will go elsewhere for them. Did you ever notice that 999 per eent of the rest-cure patients are married? "Marriage of convenience" is another hoax. The greatest will contests are among the living. The good fellow abroad and the good fellow at home are not related. Wise men know their wives, like wine, improve with age —if not exposed to too much light. About the time a woman gives her husband cause for real jealousy he discovers she isn’t worth it. Family ties should always be love knots, too frequently <■'••• v iove nots. Prevarication sar invnuteu about the time explanation When peoj y,vv; for a ’oka tn* laugh i« on "