Musings and Meditations

New Zealand Graphic, Volume XLII, Issue 7, 17 February 1909, Page 2

Musings and Meditations

By

Dog Toby

THE COMPLETE ANGLER

THE following hints on the art of catching an eligible husband have been sent me by a lady of considerable experience in such matters. The mother of seven daughters, she has lived to see them all happily settled in life, and though feelings of modesty have led her to express a desire that her name should not appear, readers may rely on her advice as being thoroughly sound and as having borne the test of experience. Her letter runs as follows:— “My Dear Toby,—l will gladly tell you anything I can, on condition that you do not publish my name. You will, I am sure, readily appreciate my motives in making this request. In my own early days it used to be thought that a girl ought to sit at home and wait the advent of the fairy prince, but in these days of fierce competition a girl who did that would soon find herself cut out by her less scrupulous rivals. The best ally a girl can have is a good sensible mother; but such mothers are rare, and the majority fail, from lack of experience, to really assist their daughters, hirst, therefore, I propose to address the mothers, and give them a little advice. “It is a great mistake to think that the really eligible young man—that is, of course, the young man of ample means —is more ready to rise to the bait in the evening than in the morning. Encourage him to call somewhere about 11 a.m. The probability is that he has spent the night before with bachelor friends. If so, he, is very likely to be feeling a little depressed, and amenable to entertaining a desire to settle down. Your daughter should be freshly and simply gowned, conveying an impression of dainty, unaffected simplicity. To produce just the right impression both in dress and manner requires much thought and practice, but it is well worth the trouble involved. "A girl who looks fresh and niee in the morning always appeals to a man. You should entertain him yourself for some little time, and then you mignt suggest that your daughter should show' him some flower or other in the garden. He will think how- nice and homelike everything is, and he will begin to wish liness of your welcome with the ill-con-trast the simple, frank, unaffected friendliness of your welcome wiui the ill-con-cealed scheming by which other mothers have sought to entrap him. If a young man is really a desirable parti, never let him think that you have the least idea that he might be attracted by any of your girls, they are just simple, good girls, who have never given a thought to anything but their home. "Some mothers are great advocates of trying to arouse an interest in their daughter by giving a young fellow to understand that there are others who have been paying her attention. Personally I do not recommend this plan, as it requires great skill to properly handle it. Yon don’t want the young ntan to think mat you look on him in the light of a possible catch, and if you hint at others you must not convey the impression that you look on them either in that light. You mignt, however, quite safely make some such remark as this: ‘My daughter Eva is so glad that she has been drawn with Mr. Smith in the club lawn tennis doubles, because Mr. Smith is such a splendid player, and she thinks they might win the prize.’ That would lie quite sufficient to make him feel that there might be a possible rival. “Encourage your girls to talk about their brothers, and the interest they take in what their brothers do, but do not let them talk about other men. Remember that they have never given a thought to anything of that sort. Do not let them ever show any signs of being oyer-dressed, but always be eareful to see that they have neat gloves and shoes. A man seldom notices what a woman has on, but be can always tell whether she looks

fresh and dainty. Let the young fellow understand that you are perfectly happy, in your own home life, that there never was a man quite like your husband, let him see the welcome papa gets when he returns from the city. This will make him think of his own loneliness, and of what a dutiful and affectionate family yours is. Thus encouraged, and with any reasonable amount of luck on your side, lie ought to be successfully landed. Much of course depends on the daughter as well as on the mother, but I have written yoit such a long letter already that I feel I must postpone my advice as far as the girl is concerned till another time. After all, the mother is the most important* because a wise mother makes a wise daughter.’’