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New Zealand Graphic, Volume XXXVIII, Issue 1, 5 January 1907, Page 21

A Connecticut newspaper editor once hired an Englishman as a reporter, and gave him as his first assignment a big tire in a nearby town. Arriving at the place, the reporter found great masses of flames pouring from the huge factory building. He seemed nonplussed and didn't know' what to do. Finally he sent back to the office this telegram: ‘•Have arrived and the fire is burning fiercely. What shall I do?” Of course, he was sent to write up the tire, but as it was now’ too late for the afternoon edition, the editor said something under his breath, and sent bark the following reply: “Find out where the tire is the hottest and jump in.’’—“New York Tribune.” On our friend's table we observe numerous bottles labelled “aniline.” “acetic acid,” “formaldehyde.” “boracie acid.” “pulverised sawdust,” “extract of chicory,” etc. Noting our look of wonderment, he explains: “You see, I grew so accustomed to eating the old-fashioned canned goods, my wife not bring a cook, that since the new purv-food laws have gone into effect 1 liave to dash the proper adulterant into each food, cutting down the supply little by little. It would have been too great a shock to leave oil everyjhimr at once.”