OVER THE TEACUPS

New Zealand Graphic, Volume XXXVII, Issue 22, 1 December 1906, Page 47

OVER THE TEACUPS

BOUDOIR GOSSIP FOR LADY READERS . . .

The Perfect Man. FROM THE PERFECT TAHX-.d POINT OF VIEW. The beauteous "mannequin”—the living model who sweeps through the salons of West End dressmaking establishments, showing off gowns and mantles, has her counterpart in the sterner sex. During tire "Tailor and Cutter” exhibition which closed last month in London, a number of "male mannequins” ■were pressed into service to show off the beauties of frock coats, lounge suits, and sporting kit. Some of them were soldier students from the Army Clothing Department at Pimlico, others were cutters who bad moulded their exhibits to their own figures. What is the perfect figure from the tailor’s point of view? This was the question propounded by a “Press” repre-. eentative to an expert at the exhibition yesterday. The expert at onee rattled off the following measurements of the tailor's ideal:—, ■ Height sft. Oins. Chest 3tnns. Waist 32ins. “The length of the leg should be .half the height, minus two inches. --The length of the sleeve, should be half..the height, minus four inches. "In France the ideal ..man's waist is thirty inches, and this applies also to ■ officers in the British Army. "A gbod figure immediately enhances the appearance of any garment. A. ‘strongs: man’ can never be well dressed. The ehest and arms should nevT be aband fat calves spell badly-set-ting trousers.” The cutter who enters for such exhibitions as that given by the “Tailor and Cutter’ I ,;Hiust,- of- necessity,- ■ lead, the simple life. Being a "male mannequin” he cultivates a certain pose in addressing his clients. His mind *s for ever on his "lower chest,” which hp .repressers, on all occasions. He endures silent agonies when a friend asks him to dine, and his soul is torn between the luscious but fatty foods, the opulent liqueur, anil the perfect set of a perfect frock coat to hi.s perfect figure. Mr. Robert Davies, t,he triumphant cutter who won the trophy for the ’ perfect frock coat” this year as well as last, moulded thf coat to his own figure. a cT o ’» a Adopted Children. Adopted children have of late come much to the fore in smart soejety,.Baroness Eekardstein, daughter and heiress of the late Sir Blundell Maple, has ndopted a small girl as a companion to her only daughter. Prjiwess Alexis Dolgorouki owns ah adopbejl "child in the person of little “Sacha,’* a Russian, who may often be seen tfiessed in white; driving in a wondrous white pony-eart. Then, at one’timc, 'Lady' Anglesey had a tiny adopted daughter, whom she used to dress exquisitely, and take to the smartest children’s parties in London. And the late Lord Anglesey also adopted a little girl, who used to drive ;with him in his carriage at (I’aris and .Horde Carlo. The mid-Vie’tprian"era 'saw' Several instances ,of adopted daughters in high society. MadalittfWsehamps, who-is'now a widow, and lives in a lovely home near Torquay, was the adopted daughter of the lute Lady-Mount Temple; and the late Princewi’ Lichtenstein known before her hlirri-iagc as Miss held this position with ,]|.ady , Holland, the World famed chatelaine of Holland House

Dressing for Dinner. CHANGE OF CLOTHES ALMOST AS BRACING AS A BATH. The “Lancet” advocates the custom of dressing for dinner, and, going even further, declares that every worker should change his clothes before the evening meal, even if he does not possess evening clothes.

"The bracing effect of a change of clothes is well known,” says the “Lancet.” Many a man feeling almost too fatigued after an arduous day’s work to change his clothes finds himself considerably refreshed when the ciiange Is accomplished, and at the same time he experiences a feeling of cleanliness. and preparedness for his dinner, and good digestion invariably waits: on healthy appetite. The changing of clothes may even thus favourably affeet nutrition. "Nor need the changing of clothes b; the exclusive luxury of the persons who dress for dinner. The hard-worked clerk, the shopkeeper, ami the working man would all be better if they would cast off their work a day clothes and put on clean clothes for the evening meal after the day of toil is over. “The effect of a change of clothes after a day s toil is in some respects similar to that of a bath, mildly stimulating, bracing; dispelling the feeling of tiredness and fatigiie so commonly expjriencwJ. -"Tb.e explanation most likely is that the clothes after they have been worn all day get more or less.clogged and lose temporarily their ventilating properties, so that the emanations of the body do not escape freely.” , a » a o 0 The Luxury of Being Stupid. Because a person is dull and dowdy, it does not follow that he or she need he’left but of all entertainments. This does not mean, however, that the dull or stupid person has as much right, to exist socially as the bright person. .Some people are really stupid, and do not try to be anything else; while others are not stupid, but wish to b? thought so. They realise the luxury which a reputation for stupidity affords. Even children of tender years are sometimes clever enough to realise it. An eight-year-old boy was sent a message by his mother. He gave it incorrectly. Soon afterwards* he was sent to - buy something. He brought home the-wrong article. “It is no use sending him any more errands,” said the mother crossly, “he is so stupid. ’ The boy confided to his sister that he hated errands, and that he knew if he executed them properly he would continually be sent here and there. This reasoning so appealed to his ■little sister that when she became older she found that she could not learn to use machine, or to make puddings. Conse'queiitly she was never asked to do any of the sewing for the. family, and her avoidance of the kitehen was hailed with relief. ’These two “stupid” children, being clever ’ enough to avoid distasteful tasks, used their brains in more congenial " directions, and were never a nuisajice in their own circle. People who go to social entertainments no right to be socially stupid. A clever man visiting Sydney said of one or two women whom he met constantly at a relative’s house that he would sooner break stones upon the road than talk to them. tA girl who is afflicted with a silent partner at'«i dance is miicX to pitied. Such a -mail is selfishly refraining from using l;is braina. Hundreds of people can talk for one who can think, said

Ruskin. When one goes into society, one cannot help wondering very often what has become of these hundreds.

The really dull and stupid, who have no other claims to toleration, are generally weeded out of social gatherings by small degrees. It is those who are not stupid, but put on a stupid disposition, that are so hard io deal with. Sometimes they are stupid simply because they want to be weeded out, sometimes because they feel lazy. For the sake of the occasions when they do not "act stupid” they arc humoured

and forgiven. The most selfish sinners are those to whom society bows down by reason of their money or position. They feign a stupidity which they do not deserve, because they realise the utterluxury which such a reputation gives them. Nothing is asked, nothing is expected of the stupid. Their lack of wit is construed into a lack of understanding of society’s requirements. The result is that they revel in laziness.

Social entertaining becomes anything but a luxury for those who neither seem nor arc stupid. Not only when she is hostess, but also when she is a guest, a girl who is clever ami at the same time conscious of her social responsibilities will often take the whole burden of entertaining a roomful upon herself. If such a girl feels that she-is partly responsible for ths success of the entertainment, her hostess will generally not hesitate to shift the burden to her willing young shoulders. At any rate she will let her share the burden equally. While the bulk of the company are luxuriating in being stupid, the hostess and her one conscientious guest are paying the penalty for being "bright.” The weight of the stupid, if they are not exceptionally bouyant, will in the end break them down. « a a o a Fashions for the Tea-table. DAINTY DESIGNS FOR ARTISTIC COSIES. The artistic tea cosy, which threat'lied, last year to go out of fashion, has returned to favour, and dainty trilles of chiffon or silk, only sufficiently large to cover the regulation “5 o’clock” feap.pt, are much in evidence. “Tea cosies are really very beautiful this season,” the manageress of an artistic fancy salon informed an "Express” representative recently. "The old cover-’, which resembled a small quilt, are quite out of favour. "One of the favourite designs for a cosy is called by the emotional name of ’Flower Fetters.’ The foundation of this cosy is a soft satin, while chains of the owner’s favourite Hower, made of chiffon, are wreathed round it. "Another pattern is one large Hower made of velvet. The petals open mid enclose the teapot. Hand-painted cosies are decorated with most elaborate designs. One of the prettiest is of white satin with tiny silver stars powdered all over it, and a large bunch of most natural looking and scented flowers tied in one corner. “We executed an order for a teapot cosy hist week of which the ground was pale rose satin. On this were embroidered baskets of forget-me-nots and violets. The baskets were worked in real silver thread, the forget-me-nots wore represented by 'turquoise, and the violets by tiny sjmetbysts. "We are nlso selling cosy sets, which consist of tea and coffee-pot cosies, six egg, mullin dish, and hot milk jug covers, al) made in the:-, same pattern.

Ravenous Wedding Guests. John Eickhorst, a wealthy peasant of Oerdinghausen, in West Prussia, invited to the wedding of his daughter only guests with good, heal by app.titcs. For each gue-t he provided 1 Jib of beef, lib of pork, fjlb of veal,, Alb of mutton, and half a fowl, with an unlimited supply of vegetables, bread, win 1 ', and lieer. The guests rose to the occasion and. consumed 15001 b of beef. 12001 b of pork, ItOOlb of veal, GOOlb of mutton, 250 chickens, 150 geese, 100 ducks, 100 turkeys, 350 loav. s of bread. Five tents were erected to accommodate the 1200 guests. Eickhorst is a peasant who lias grown wealthy, and owns a large estate, but he still clings to the p asiwit customs of hospitality and the peasant appetite. 0 0 0-0 Ct Evolution of the Ruffle. RETURN OF AN ELIZABETHAN FASHION. The tulle ruffle is passing through certain well denned processes of evolution that threaten io bring the Elizabethan ruff into fashion again. “There certainly seems to be a chance that the Elizabethan ruff will become fashionable,” says a West End lodiste. “When the tulle ruffle first came in it was a soft, gossamer arrangement, as light as thistledown. Gradually the ruffle became more substantial, flower petals were sewn on the tulle, and a stiff’ muslin lining was employed to hold up the inching. “The 190 G ruffle is not the most comfortable form of adornment. It is wider than its predecessors, and <!oz.ens of yards of stiffened tulle are used in its making. The lady who wears the modern Elizabethan ruff might easuy be accused of being disdainful. She cannot turn her head to the right or the left, and if she lowers her chin she is soon reminded of what she is wearing.” » Ci O C. Ct Gambling for Charity. "Yes, of course. I play bridge for money, but the stakes are never high, and 1 save all my winnings and give them to charity,” remarked a well-known society woman to an interested American friend. “Last winter,” she continued, “a party of ten of my friends went up to the Adirondaeks for a week’s frolic, and I was trying at the time to think of some way of donating 20dol. to a big charity bazaar that was being planned/ I didn’t want to ask people for the cash.' but 1 had promised to give something of 20 dollars’ value to be sold by chance, and my husband had. personally given 40d01., so I couldn’t ask him for "assistance. We played cards on the train going up to the mountains, and I warned the party that I was but to win 20d01., and as soon as I had won it wbutd stop and not play, again until after”my retifrn liotne.” I won the 20dol; the 1 first day, which was an absolutely ujipar-' alleled streak of luck for me. ally a loser. Then I bought a mission rocker and. made them all chaiuvs on it after they had lost their cash to me to buy it with. There were 100 chances sold at 50 cents each, and the bazaar was richer by 50dpi., so you see the consequences of bridge-playing are not’always dire and dreadful.”

How to be Well-bred.

A GOSH* ABOUT DRESS AND ■ORNAMENT. To a woman her dress is something more than covering and ornament. If we are to believe notable students of the feminine character, it is an index to her mind and a revelation of her good breeding, or its reverse. In the “Taller,” Richard Steele, that universal lover of women; describes a certain Fnlvio, “ the gent-eelest woman you meet." as la-ing always well-dressed, her garb so eharming “ that you would think it impossible she should change it for anything so becoming. There is no mystery in this,” he adds—“ a woman must think well to look well.” So while it is a small-minded woman who lets dress and ornament be the chief interest in her life, one who wishes to be wellbred will neither despise nor neglect them. To quote another old writer, “A woman’s dress is like the of a letter —the cover is frequently an index to the contents.” WHAT TO AVOID. To be the sign of good breeding, dress should he attractive without extravagance. A woman need not be dressed in silks and chiffons to be stamped a lady; indeed, she will ook vulgar in these if they are patently inappropriate to the occasion and to her position. The wellbred woman never does her marketing in an elaborate gown and feathered hat, any more than she will visit a friend later in the day or go to church in the frock and the headgear which are suitable to the former occasion. THE KEY-NOTE QF GOOD DRESSING. Suitability is the chief key-note of good dressing. The well-bred woman seeks something which, while quiet, looks “individual.” One often betas it said, Such-and-such a lady has her own style.” which means that she has decided what liecomes her; and. without too flagrantly running counter to accepted “ inodes,” avoids what is extreme, and alters her own fashions but slightly' Clothes should always be suitable to the climate and weather, to the wearer’s age no less than her position, and to the business or pleasure on which she is bent. A eolhtrless blouse or a “transparent yoke ” in chilly weather or in the street is in the worse taste, because somanifestly unsuitable, and are never seen On the well-bred girl; nor will she indulge a taste for frills and chiffons, charms and bangles, in those hours which she devotes to the serious business of her day. Flaunting colours, extreme shapes and styles, excess of trimming, over-elabo-ration in hairdressing, and the lavish use of pungent perfumes, are. always to he avoided. That greta authority on dress Beau Brummel—used to ' say, “You are never well dessed if people Stop to stare at you.” JEWELLERY SHOULD HE WORN SPARINGLY. Jewellery, even if it be good and beautiful. should lie worn sparingly, especially by the young, and seldom in the street. I recall the adverse impression made on me a little time ago by the inroad into the railway carriage where I was seated of a stout, oflrid. young ■woman, hetaed by an undignified rush along the platform, gloveless, panting, and buttons and hooks agape here and there. “Only just caught the train by a rush!” she cried breathlessly to a friend. “[ know I look a sight—lint there” — she glanced complacently at the couple of long chains, the miscellaneous collection of trinkets |iendunt from them, the bangles on her wrists, and the ponderous rings on her bare fingers—“anyone can tell I am u lady from my jewellery”—a statement with which her companion, a mountainous lady who bore the name “Tiny" in paste diamonds on her breast, Was in complete accord. To one who would la* well-bred both these women were striking exuniples of “What not to do." ABOUT IMITATION JEWELLERY. On the question of the propriety of Wearing "imitation jewellery.” there used once to be much debate. It was thought exceedingly ba dform to wear nn ornament which was not “real,” but the art “f to-day fashions so many ornaments Which, while of no groat intrinsic value, are beautiful in design and workmanship.

and these, beeau-e they do not pretend to be other than they are. may be worn by the well-bred woman. Vulgarity only comes when the ornament |«retends to be something rt is mot and -Hie wearer wishes to give that false impression. “Sham” of all kinds is in bad taste. BE CAREFUL OF YOUR APPEARIn her own home the well-bred woman is as careful of her appearance, as neat and daintily attamd. aa-twhen “eKpeetiag company” or preparing to visit. Her duties and her purse may compel her to wear a simpler and more unsuitable gown, but it will be clean, whole, and well put nn. No lady would be seen in the bosom of her family with soiled collar or hanging braid while soap and water and needle and thread are within reach. The blouse bulging at the waist, the stained skirt, the hair left undressed until late in the day, betray the underbred. I have heard dark hints of women who go about their household duties during the early hours of the day in dressing-gown and bedroom slippers. The gentlewoman ever does such things;. and 4he girl who would become a woman of refinement will not permit herself, through indolence, to slip into such habits. We should be able to look into the mirror at any hour without any loss of self-respect. “I just despise myself when I look frowsy, and I never let myself look so without paying a fine into my pin-box,” said a bright American girl. She had the secret of good breeding, though she spent less than fifteen pounds a year on her dress and worked hard for her living. 000 0 0 Girl Architect. Miss Elspeth McClelland, the girl architect, who sprang into fame among women workers in the Old Country last year, has been steadily rising in her profession. Her latest achievement is a design for a house, at Grange-over-Sands, overlooking Morecambe Bay. “I am very proud of my house,” Miss McClelland told an “Express” representative recently. “It is the most ambitious design that I have ever attempted. The house is built on a hill, overlooking the sea, and the views are really magnificent. A special feature has therefore been made of the windows, which are very large. “The style is Elizabethan, and the house is built of grey stone with a slate roof. There are five bedrooms, two reception rooms, and a large hall with a delightful ingle nook. The domestic offices arc .most luxurious, my client being very particular on this point. “I am so thoroughly interested in my profession that it is a delight to feel that I am succeeding.” Miss McClelland continued. .“My first work was decorative designs and advice on furnishing, and this I have never allowed to drop. The inside is as important as the outside of a house. I worked for a Bond-street firm, and as I often had to design alterations in cottages. such as the addition of a bay window, I thought a knowledge of building construction would be useful. “I had great difficulty in obtaining admission to the Polytechnic building classes, for there were 000 men and I was the only girl, but I had my way and worked hard. “During the last few months I have been lecturing on workmen’s cottages, and next month I shall travel from place to place lecturing on furniture from an historical point of view.” 0 0 0 0 0 Poison Leads to a Wedding. A romantic wedding has just taken place in Paris, a chemist, marrying the widow of a man whom he had accidentally poisoned. Some two years ago the chemist sold to a servant a quantity of arsenic in mistake for bicarbonate of soda. It was not until half an hour later that he discovered his mistake, and rushed off in a cab to the customer's residence, only to find that, the man was dead. The chemist offered T4(KH) to the widow if she consented not to prosecute him, and Mie real cause of the husband's sudden death never transpired.

The chemist sold his business and pursued another occupation, in which he has succeeded. A year ago he proposed to the customer’s widow, but the marriage was only celebrated recently.

Make the Best of Things (By Beatriee 4-'**rfa«3 ’ lie still, sad heart, and eease repining; Behind the clouds is the sun still shin ing. Thy fute is the common fate of all. Into each life stime rain must fall; Some days be dark and eold and dreary, —Tennyson. Disappointment, disillusionment, and trouble are bound to eoine to us alt. We can’t get away from our share of earthly ills, but there’s no sense in sitting down and crying over them. If we want to have any sort of life at all, we must make the best of things. We are altogether too much given to exaggerating our troubles. So often what seems to be a mountain of trouble will settle down to nothing but a little molehill of worry. And in the meantime we will have worn ourselves to “frazzles” worrying over it. Things that seem terrible at nighttime are not so bad when faced in the morning. Of course, there are some troubles which must just be faced and accepted as our share of life’s handicap. But even they will not be helped any by nursing and brooding over. It is better to tuck them away in our heart’s deepest corner, and only look at them when they fight their way to the front. There is nothing so hard to fight against as heartache. It throbs and throbs, and when you think you have conquered it it awakens and throbs more fiercely than ever. But time, that blessed healer, softens it eventually, and leaves nothing but » sear to remind us of the pain.

If you have a trouble or a heartache to fight, keep at it unceasingly. Don’t give way to it, nor encourage it for one moment.

Conquer it, or it will conquer you and make you a miserable pessimist. If you conquer, you will be a better man or woman for the struggle. The way is long and runs through the valley of tears; but the sun shines at the end of the journey. And it may be some comfort to know that there are - thousands travelling the same weary way. If the sun shone on us all the time we would be hothouse plants, unable to stand the least breath of adversity. It takes unhappiness as well as happiness to make us ■ strong, brave men and women. We must look for the sunshine behind the clouds and make the most of it, and when the days are “dark and cold and dreary” we must accept without complaint our share of life’s bitterness. 0 0 0 0 0 Neatness Pays. ANOTHER LITTLE TALK ON MAKING THE BEST OF ONESELF. Two women sat at near-by tables in a restaurant, one with glowing, unlined face, glossy hair, bright eyes; the other sallow, wj-inkled, with dull liair showing from under her toque. In years and dress they were about on a par. But one looked ten years older than the other—passe, uninteresting. Yet the difference was altogether a matter of taking proper care. If those two women were to seek a business posit ion, which think you, other things being equal, would get it? If they have children, which are the children likely to regard their mother with the greater pride and loving ad miration? In their circle, of friends, which is the more sought after-—the comely, bright, glowing woman who breathes vitality, good health, and joy in living from the very finger tips; or the wrinkled, sallow woman, who shows weariness of the world from her whole being? It’s a duty as well as a pleasure to be as beautiful as possible. Make up your nnind 'to look “well-groomed” as to hair, teeth, nails, skin, and small details of dress. Live simply, and avoid ail that makes for indigestion and billiousness. We expeet the young to have good complexions and bright eyes, but to carry this guerdon of youth far down the aisles of time—ah, that is to possess n charm well worth every woman's earnest seeking. . iMtliatMiilal^d.l