The Graphic FUNNY LEAF

New Zealand Graphic, Volume XXXIV, Issue 24, 17 June 1905, Page 64

The Graphic FUNNY LEAF

-—.— i AT THE MISSION SUNDAY- -CHOOL. Teacher : X. >w. Jimmie, do you know what Solomon said to the Queen of Sheba when ■‘lie brought him her gobi an I jewels? •Emmie : Why. hully smokes’, uv course 1 know*. He says. “How much do yer want on ’em?"

POOR FELLOW! Gerald: “Can you give me no hope'?’* Geraldine: “None whatever; I’m going to marry you.” HER SYMPATHY. “What’s the matter?” she asked. “Nothing.” replied the departing caller, severely, “except that your dog has bitten me.” “Oh!” she exclaimed. “Poor Fido!” HUSH! Mrs Subbubs: “Henry. Bridget broke three of our very best plates to-day.” Mr Subbubs: “Heavens! Could anything possibly be worse?*’ Mrs Subbubs: “Sh! it isn't as bad as it might be. She immediately hid the pieces, and if we can only look pleasant and pretend we know nothing about it. I think she’ll stay.” WHERE IGNORANCE IS BLISS. Patient: “Great Scott! Doctor, that's an awful bill for one week’s t reatment! ” Physician: “Ah dear fellow, if you knew what an interesting case yours was. and how strongly I was tempted to let it go to a post-mortem, you wouldn’t grumble at a bill three times as big as this.” DIDN'T APPROX E OF THE FEAST. 1 iie lesson was from the prodigal *on. and the teacher was dwelling on the character of the elder brother. “But amid all tin* rejoicings.” he said, “there was one to whom the preparation of the feast brought no joy. to whom the prodigal's return gave no pleasure, but only bitterness; one who • lid not approve of the Last being held, ami who had no wish to .attend it. Now. can any of you tell who this A little boy tinally vouchsafed this mswer: “Please, -ir.' it was the fatted calf!”

A HARD ROW. Macßootli Rantington.—This show won’t last long. The First Violin.—Don't see ht.w it van. with the hotel-keepers getting two hundred per cent, of the gross receipts.

Will you throw in the lamps and the accessories?” 1 can’t do that, but I’ll throw in the clutch.” All right, I’ll take the ear.”