Is Mrs. Grundy Dead?

New Zealand Graphic, Volume XXX, Issue XXVI, 27 June 1903, Page 1831

Is Mrs. Grundy Dead?

(By

Mrs. C. E. Humphrey.)

They eat aud drink and scheme and plod, They go to church on Sunday; Aud many are afraid of God — And more of Mrs. Grundy. —Frederick Lockyer. There are certain circles of society in which Mrs. Grundy seems to be dead indeed. She is deaf and dumb and blind and comatose, and in that condition is no more regarded than if she were as dead as a door nail. But in those very smart and extremely lively circles there is one law which must not be broken. “Thou shalt not be found out.” So long as no breath of publicity is suffered to assail the sinner, Mrs. Grundry remains deaf and dumb and blind and comatose. The real facts may be common property, whispered from mouth to mouth, the topic of boudoirs and afternoon teas, even of dinner parties , when the , servants have left the room. They may be well known in the servants’ hall and at the elub for “gentlemen’s gentlemen.” What is there that is unknown to servants? The facts may be the subjee anecdote, bon-mot, and the fashionable form of conundrum beginning with “Why” and answered with “Because”; but nothing of this kind constitutes publicity. If. however, an “inspired” paragraph should appear in a society paper, if notice of proceedings in a Court of Justice, then who so wide-awake as Mrs Grundy ? Instead of deafness, is she not all ears so far as may be compatible with being also all eyes, all tongue? And she has a very nasty way of punishing the lesser sinner with many strokes, while she lets off the baser and the guiltier with few. MRS. GRUNDY AND THE INNOCENTS. Mrs. Grundy is like the law in this particular, that her decisions are often totally contradictory to equity and justice. ' Perhaps she like to masquerade with Justice’s bandage on her eyes a rd the crooked scales of the blindfold god dess in her hands. What did Shakespeare say: “Be tliou chaste as ice, pure as snow, thou shai not ’scape calumny.” Mrs. Grundy takes care to prove the poet true. She sometimes seizes on a reputation and tears it to tatters; discovering too late that she has ruined a life that is in reality above reproach. But her injustice has often so wrought upon its victim that in the end the lat ter has become all that the world mistakenly thought her. In “Monna Vanna” Maeterlinck, who knows his world, allows his readers to suppose that this noble woman, finding it impossible to get anyone to believe in her innocence and that of her true lover, leaves her incredulous husband and joins the other. What else is left to her to do? She has supplied evidence of the sort that convinces a British jury in the Divorce Court; a jury that regards the opportunity for wrong-doing as proof enough

that wrong-doing has been done. Her earnest assertions of innocence; her cries to heaven to be her witness are jeered at by her husband, and by her world. They are nothing in the eyes of Mr. and Mrs. Grundy, who could not b ■- lieve in the possibility of any man or woman remaining guiltless in cireum stances so favourable to guilt. And so are the innocent souls thrust into sin by evil report. It needs a tine moral nore to keep the soul stainless when in the eyes of the world it is besmirched. And in the other balance, curiously contrasted, is that other soul that knows itself to be hopelessly polluted, but yet maintains all the appear unce of innocence in the eyes of the world. Such a woman as this may h.v.broken every one of the Ten Commandments, but she has religiously observe I the eleventh —“Thou shalt not be found out ” and it is counted unto her for righteousness. Mothers allow their young daughters to meet her, even to be chaperoned by her. “We really know nothing,” they say in excuse when an outspoken frieicd remonstrates. “The scandal may be all talk and nothing 'nore.” So long as Mrs. Grundy is silent, so are those who find it to their advantage to keep on good terms with the eleventh commandment lady. MRS GRUNDY’S USES. For Mrs Grundy has her uses. “What will people say?” is an excellent deterrent; a consideration that has kept the great middle class of England a model to the nations, of propriety and clean liness of living. Whether we take the upper middleclass, including the families of professional men, such as doctors, clergy, lawyers, and the distinguished in ant and letters; or whether we regard the stratum of respectable tradespeople; we cannot review this important section of society without coming to the conclusion that without it the whole social structure would fall to pieces. In our great middle-class, which has its own aristocracy, its own middlecnss, it- bourgeoisie, the principles that rule life from within are found in vital action. The class above is a law uut > itself. The class below is not law abiding. It is the middle-class that worthily fulfils the function of citizenship and makes the nation what it is. In it are crystallised the great national characteristics —love of home, integrity of purpose, purity of life, and detestation of all that wars against these. And if there are any who incline towards laxity of life, it is the fear of Mrs Grundy that often keeps them from transgress ing the social law’s that have surrounded them from childhood. Mrs Grundy is as good as an artificial conscience in

cases where the real conscience has proved Itself not up to its work. WHERE SHE IS MOST ACTIVE. if any one, misled by the quiescence of Mrs Grundy in certain circles, should suppose the lady to be dead, a visit to a quiet country village will soon disabuse the mind of any such idea. The smaller the village, the greater seems to be the amount of talk and scandal that pervades it. “The neighbours” appear to take a most unneighbourly delight in imputing the basest of motives tor actions that, rightly viewed, arg perfectly compatible with absolute innocence. Mrs Grundy is so busy watching everybody that she acquires a squint and takes a distorted view of all she sees. A purely disinterested piece of kindness is beyond her comprehension; so she sorts out of her repertoire some vile motive for it, and at once sets it down to the account of the victim. Everything fine and noble, everything of which she is herself incapable, must be the outcome of evil, in her opinion. That is Mrs Grundy’s darker side. She is no longer a salutary influence in life when she sets tongues wagging against those who merit praise rather than blame. A POISONED THOUGHT. A lady living in a large city and in the enjoyment of ample means and plenty of leisure bethought her of throwing her house open on two or three evenings of every week to young men, acquaintances of her own sons. She realised how lonely and how full of temptation is the life of a young man who, fresh from school or college, lives in more or 'ess dreary lodgings and enjoys little, if any, social intercourse. She knew how easy it is for such a young man to get into bad habits, to

misuse his leisure hours, to fall among bad companions, and to drop into a lower social grade than that to which his birth entitles him. Had she not 'thought it all out in the case of her own boys? it was better to give them the advantage of home life that she had set up housekeeping in the city, where she sons were employed. The evenings in her comfortable home were thoroughly appreciated. There was music. Some brought u violin, a uar.jo, a mandolin, and part singing became an amusement. Many a young man carries through life a grateful memory of all that refined home, with its gentle, motherly mistress, did for him. But one day that lady chanced to overhear a remark made about herself in ignorance that she was near. Accompanies by a sneer and a horrid laugh, the remark was—“Oh, yes! We all know that Mrs Blank is very fond of boys!” There was less in the words than in the manner and tone of them, which made them equivalent to an insult. Mrs Grundy’s low-minded representative very nearly succeeded in this instance in stopping as good and kindly a work as was ever undertaken, for Mrs Blank, outraged by the light in which her action appeared to be regarded very nearly decided to elose her doors again-,?, the young men she had so hospitably’ en tertained. Though she decided that she could not allow’ evil to prevail over good, and went on in her kindly course, all the pleasure of it was spoiled for her by the poisoned thought that she was thoroughly and radically misunderstood. THE DEVIL’S WORK. A girl sometimes says—“l don’t care what people say,” but she does eare, and it is well that she should care. Here is where the useful s'de of Mrs Grundv

Kimes in, and in this phase one pictures her as a kindly old lady with a benevolent face, and snowy cap and kerchief, doing her l»est to keep the young things out of danger. She is. in truth, a protean. being Monietiinea full of hatred, malice, and all iincharitabieneKs; at others the prudent shepherdess of the inexperienced. She might always present the more agreeable aspect if there were no spiteful. scandal-mongering men and women in the world, ready and anxious'to do her work for her in a spirit of malevolence. lake the following ower-true tale, as* an example: one to be very carefully avoided. A lady living in London, and known to a large circle of friends, was one day the victim of an unfortunate mistake, which resulted in the publication of her name in connection with a police court c? s •. in which the person brought up before the magistrate had been intoxicated and ‘’disorderly/’ The whole thing was a mistake, as any open-minded reader of the report could at once have discovered; and the impulse of any woman of fine nature and generous mind would have been to sympathise with the lady who had been the victim of so extremely disagreeable an error. Not so, however, with a certain acquaintance of hers who, having cut the report from a newspaper, carried it about for months in her purse, a minever lost an opportunity of reading it to those who bad not heard of the circumstance. Now here was Mrs Grundy, in the person of a malicious and ill-bred woman. doing the devil’s work for him! And she had the splendid opportunity of doing angels’ work in this very matter. could have as busily employed herself in clearing the name and reputation of her acquaintance, in strongly

asserting her own belief in the maligned person, and in bringing the whole of her personal influence to bear upon the aide of truth and justice, to say nothing of kindness and generosity. She ehose the Other Person’s work, and did it well! Our law is supposed to regard ati accused person as innocent until proved to be guilty. Though all its practices are not consistent with this theory, it is yet recognised as one of its perma nent principles. Mrs Grundy’s is the very opposite. Siu- regards every one as guilty until he or she is proved to be not guilty; and. what is more, even when triumphantly proved to be innocent, that unfortunate individual is seldom completely exonerated by Mrs Grundy. She whispers. "There must have been some thing in it, you know,” or ‘’There’s no smoke without fire.”. The fact is, the Ohl Lady is like the moon—she has her dark side as well as her bright; and so far as humanity is concerned she is immortal, for she will continue among men and women as long as the moon lasts. Our moral atmosphere will be aware of her until sun. moon, and stars are swallowed up in the tremendous changes towards which our earth is hastening with every diurnal revolution. And Mrs Grundy is almost as old as the moon. She made her appearance with the Fall of Man, and will continue with us until sin and sorrow and remorse and shame are removed far from us. When this happy consummation is achieved, her occupation will be gone. Wedding of Miss Ellen Thorneycroft Fowler. There was a brilliant gathering at Tettenhall Church recently to witness the wedding of Miss Elen Thomeyeroft Fowler, the clever elder daughter of Sir Henry Fowler. M.P. for East Wolverhampton. A large gathering of people tried to get a glimpse of the bride, who has made this corner of the Midlands famous in her writings, wherein Wolverhampton has figured as “Silverhanipton” and Tettenhall as “Tetleigh.” The bridegroom was Air Lawrence Felkin, one of the masters at the Royal Naval College, Eltham. He, like his wife, is an author, and there is every reason to think that the character of Paul Seaton, in “Concerning Isabel Carnaby,” was drawn from that of the hero of last week’s ceremony. This last was the happy ending to an engagement, which has been an “open” secret amongst the relatives for some years. There were five bridesmaids, one of them being her sister, whose fiancee was one of the officiating clergy. The weather was brilliant, except for a slight fall of snow, and everybody wished the newlv-wedded couple long life and happi-