Plain Talk by a Plain Woman.

New Zealand Graphic, Volume XXX, Issue XV, 11 April 1903, Page 980

Plain Talk by a Plain Woman.

SELF ABSORPTION. « M. LJRMS of selfishness are -ti . numerous, and most of them A 5 apparent to others around . us- But perhaps the most B hurtful, because the most insidious, B° is that on which I propose to lecture you awhile. Now, I do not blame any one of you for probing into your own character. This is one of the best means of finding out our weaknesses, as it may also be used as the means of conquering our more unworthy selves. But there is a growing tendency nowadays to become self-centred. Girls speak of themselves. The girls who say, “ ’ am going to do this,” “I did so-and-so," “I think,” etc., etc., are by no means as uncommon as you may think. Reflect! Are you not always propounding your views, or are you not always judging things by your lights? Do you not often condemn actions because they are not in accordance with your opinions ? Do you not often fancy that your troubles are more deserving of sympathy than anyone's? Do you ever put yourself outside of your own little sphere of thought, and judge from the point of view likely to be taken by those you condemn ? Do you ever wonder how you and your circumstances may appear to those who are not particularly interested in you ? I ’erhaps one great cause may be the modern novel; another may possibly be the many forms of recreation open to girls ; another may even be the growth of intelligence. Whatever it is. it is obvious to many that we are striving too much to win for ourselves as individuals approbation, sympathy, pleasure. Look behind! Think! By gaining anything you wish, are you not pushing back another in the race J When you are fretting inwardly that your lot is not cast in pleasant places, are you not wearying some one else? When you are pouring out your woes in the longing for sympathy. are you not, just a little, boring th • unfortunate listener? When you rush away to your tennis, your book, your outing, are you sure that you are not leaving work for others? or are you not leaving some one who will be lonely? How much do you do for others? By how much do you lighten the burden of only one other? How much thought and consideration do you expend on any but yourself ? Let me give you a thought. Whenever you find that you are talking of yourself, pause, to put yourself in the listener's place. Whenever you find your thoughts dwelling on yourself, go straight away to do some little kindness for somebody else.