ANSWERS TO CORRESPONDENTS.
Notice to contributors.—Any letters or 3fSS. received by the Editor of the New Zealand Graphic will be immediately acknowledged in this column.
‘lnez.’ —Oil painting on linen will wash. Water does not mix with oil, therefore cannot dilute it; but only use pure soap, no ammonia or soda in the water. ‘ Fear.’— I am so sorry for youraccident with the lamp, and very glad to be able to tell you what to do next time. It is a simple remedy, and cannot be too well known. Sand or flour thrown in a heavy mass on to the burning oil will extinguish it. Every household should be prepared for an emergency; a box of sand, kept in some convenient place, is desirable wherever lamps are in general use. ‘ Moses S.’—Your question is a somewhat difficult one to answer, but I will do my best. It is perfectly possible to have a very pleasant friendship between a man and a woman with no thoughts of love-making at all in it, but it requires tact and care. It is very seldom that correspondence such as that in which you are engaged can be carried on without eventual disadvantage to the woman. If she becomes engaged to some one else, it has to be dropped. Similarly, if he becomes engaged, an estrangement almost certainly follows. If both keep free from ties, one or the other is likely to read into the letters more meaning than they are meant to convey. Some allowance must be made for people who are inveterate letter-writers. We have known men and women who would reel off letters by the half-dozen to all their acquaintances, male and female ; and everybody perfectly understood that these letters, though full of a cheerful affection, had no special meaning. It is evident, however, that you have other thoughts than those of friendship present with you ; and, that being so, it is advisable to guard against going forward into a deepening disappointment. Try to place the correspondence upon a perfectly understood footing—either absolutely free from all reference to marriage, or else with marriage as the avowed end ; otherwise complications and unhappiness are likely to ensue. ‘Mother of Five.’—l can imagine you find it veryhard with your five daughters to dress them each suitably. I very strongly advise you to adopt the sensible plan of giving an allowance, and expecting them to keep within it. I should begin as soon as they are able to understand the use of money. Commence at 3d a week, and encourage them to keep an account cf all they spend ; also strongly encourage a savings-bank book. When they are older they want more. In the case of boys who have been used to this system, when they begin to earn money they know how to take care of it, and are used to spending it advisedly. As a rule, when a boy or girl gets money he or she simply wastes it, merely because they have not been used to the judicious handling of it from childhood. This is a most important matter, and much misery would be spared in families and with individual youths and maidens if they had only been properly taught the use and abuse of money. To return to your case. Encourage the saving of pennies to buy presents, however small, for each other’s birthdays. This teaches generosity and loving thought for others. Let them give a penny now and again to charity, Sunday school Fund, etc , and tell them that God expects a certain part (formerly a tenth) of all that He has given us—money, time, talents. When your girls are old enough, say fifteen, give them a dress allowance. Start them well with a present of some nice calico or flannelette for underlinen, and teach them to make it properly ; then help them to lay out their money. This quarter they will want (say) an evening dress, a pair of winter boots, a pair of gloves and an umbrella. The next they will want a warm cape or jacket, a winter hat and indoor shoes, also a pair of dancing-shoes, etc., etc. Meantime it will be a sister’s birthday, and 5s 6d must go for a present of a pair of gloves, or if times are bad, and expenses heavy just then, give a bit of lace (good) or ribbon or a book, as liked. I should have a dressmaker by the day. You could get one for three shillings a day and her meals. Of course your (laughter would help her, so that in two days a good dress could be made and a blouse arranged, which could lie finished without the dressmaker. The first quarter’s expenditure for an allowance of £ 20 per annum would be something like this : —
Dress (all included), £1 10s ; umbrella, 10s ; boots, I2s6d ; gloves from 2s 6d to 3s 6d. This leaves a trifle for collection in church, etc. The second quarter : cape and dress, /3; hat, 15s ; shoes, ss. This leaves a pound for whatever is needed, or it could be put by towards a nice spring dress, or spent on silk and lace for a good evening blouse. Of course with this allowance you must watch for the semi-annual sales, and save enough out of the allowance to buy dress material, etc., so that it will go as far as possible. With care, an umbrella will last two years for best, then keep it for common and buy another for smart occasions. Never wear a good dress in the house when there are no visitors. Always change your street costume when you come in. Shake and brush it and your hat, and put carefully by ; they will last twice as long. I know a lady who (with great care) dresses well on /15 a year. A Grandmother.’—l do not care to give you my own opinion on tight-lacing. I will only say that there are very few men who do not make nasty remarks on an obviously waspish waist. I will quote for you the words of a celebrated London doctor on ‘ the eyesight and tightlacing:’—‘No girl who cares a brass farthing about her beauty, complexion, or eyesight, will be foolish enough to lace up too tightly. I never did, nor never will, make war upon the corset. If scientifically made—which veryvery few are —it is good for the weakly in back and in loin. It should support, however, without constricting the internal organs. The eyesight is very often injured for life by tight-lacing. But, alas ! I fear I must preach and preach in vain against a habit that is not only slowly fatal to health, but sometimes causes asphyxia and death. Mothers should see to it that their daughters do not adopt so foolish and dangerous a habit. Indeed, I do not put it a bit too strongly if I add that tight-lacing is immodest; like the painted lip or powdered brow, or too fringey hair, it is a direct invitation to the other sex to look and admire. On the contrary, if he is a man worth talking to, he will merely smile.’ ‘lsabel.’ — For the division in the room you speak of, try some reversible cretonne. You can get an extremely pretty one, the same pattern in colours, at the D.S.C. Company, Queen-street, Auckland. It is only is 9<l a yard, and would answer your purpose beautifully. Whilst you are there, look at their plushette curtains, and see if you would not like them for the drawing-room. I think you would be very well satisfied with whatever you purchase there. ‘ A Seven Years' Reader.’—ls there any necessity for either of you to ‘ beg pardon ’ of the other ? Would it not be possible to begin by showing yourself friendly ? You could do it by sending a gift or birthday token. Probably, if either of you waits until the other apologises, as the beginning of a renewal of your intercourse, you will never be friendly again. Pardon that is begged because it is demanded is of no value whatever. Would it not be better to resume a kindly attitude, and see if that does not touch her heart and lead her to say, on her own account, that she is sorry for the estrangement ? ‘ Aqua Pura. ’ —l am rather amused by your questions about drinking water, and have looked up some authorities on the subject. According to Dr. Le Camus, in the Journal d' Hygiine, water is the best drink for mind and body. Water-drinkers are, as a rule, peaceable, taciturn, and of rather a cold temperament; hence it has been said that water-drinkers are seldom men of genius. Dr. Le Camus seems to think the last motion a mistake ; but he remarks that one may drink too much water, and at the wrong time. Too much of it makes the blood aqueous and softens the fibres, producing what we call a phlegmatic temperament, which he thinks is the least suited for the cultivation of the sciences. Dr. Le Camus advises phlegmatic persons to drink a sufficient quantity of pure wine, or wine and water, according to their age, constitution, sex, season, climate, and the nature of the wine. Coffee and aromatic plants also correct the ill-effects of water on such temperauients. ‘Noel.’ —Male voices are naturally divided into three classes—tenor, barytone and bass, differing from each other both in range and quality. In part music arranged for mixed voices, when the tenor part is written in the treble clef it is so written for convenience in notation, and thus frequently appears to be higher than the soprano part, although it actually sounds an octave lower than written. The tenor part in the ordinary arrangements of hymn tunes is written in the bass clef, indicating the notes actually sung. The range of the average tenor voice is from B flat on the second line of the bass stafl to Aor A flat above middle C. Some men can sing naturally a harmonising tenor part in a mixed quartet, but it is usual for the tenor, as for all the members of the quartet, to read the notes allotted to his part. • Dolly Gay.’—Many thanks. Will do admirably. Please communicate with me again.
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Bibliographic details
New Zealand Graphic, Volume XVIII, Issue XVIII, 1 May 1897, Page 531
Word Count
1,710ANSWERS TO CORRESPONDENTS. New Zealand Graphic, Volume XVIII, Issue XVIII, 1 May 1897, Page 531
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Acknowledgements
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