ANYTHING IN REASON.

New Zealand Graphic, Volume XVI, Issue XXII, 30 May 1896, Page 640

ANYTHING IN REASON.

A traveller who was going in leisurely fashion about Ireland, many years ago, says that the smaller inns there were wretched places, where one could find nothing desirable—but courtesy. At one of them this dialogue took place between a guest and a waiter : ‘ What can we have for dinner ?’ •Anything you please, ma’am. Anything you please !' • Well, but exactly what can we have ?’ • You can have a pair of ducks !’ ‘ I am sorry to say my father cannot eat ducks. What else?’ ‘ They are fine ducks, ma’am !’ • I dare say. What else ’’ • You might have the ducks boiled, rua’atn !’ • No, no ! Can we have mutton ?’ ‘ Well, not mutton to day, ma’am.’ ‘ Some beef ?’ ‘ No, ma’am.’ ‘ Some veal ?’ ‘Not any veal, I’m afraid.’ ‘ Well, then, a fowl !’ ‘ We haven’t got a fowl.’

‘ What on earth have you, then ?’ ‘ Well, then, ma’am, I’m afeard if you won't have the fine pair of ducks, there’s nothing for it but bacon and eggs !’