LISTEN TO THE TALE OF WOE.

New Zealand Graphic, Volume IX, Issue 17, 23 April 1892, Page 430

LISTEN TO THE TALE OF WOE.

H.M.S. TAURANGA AT NEW PLYMOUTH

[The following letter has found its way into our letter box. It is manifestly written by some guileless young thing at New Plymouth, and intended for some Auckland girl, but so far our researches have not resulted in her identification. ll'e now venture to publish the document, hoping it may meet the eye of the lady for whom it was intended.— Vm. Graphic ] My Dear Eupiiemia. April 11.

Last time I wrote to you I promised you should hear again from me soon, so I hasten to do so as I said I would. The man-of-war Tauranga came to visit us on Saturday, thereby causing great excitement among our young folk. Now they are all of them quite au fait on the subject of torpedoes, cannon, etc., and their admiration for jolly Jack Tar is very intense and real. In a weak moment I too was prevailed upon to go out and inspect a ‘ real live ’ man of war. Now lam a wiser and, alas ! sadder woman. There was a nasty little breeze blowing all the time, and the waves were in wild spirits on account of the honour conferred upon Taranaki by a visit from such illustrious strangers—in fact, they could not be kept within bounds at all, but literally ‘stood on an heap.’ They seemed greatly amused at the audacity of the little Mohaka and the suif boat in putting out to sea when there was such a stiff breeze blowing, and tossed us from one crest to another in a most unfeeling and spiteful way. It was too bad of the waves, for on our way down we had been paying them all sorts of delicate little compliments. From a distance they really did look lovely—deep transparent green with flecks and fringes of snowy white. Upon further acquaintance they were really most disappointing, and did not look half so well. Of this lam certain, for 1 myself looked over the side of the Mohaka to investigate the matter thoroughly, and a great many others of the passengers looked over too, and I know they will all agree in telling you the same as I have done. In fact, I don’t believe I shall ever really admire waves again, and I have abandoned the idea of having a new dress for the volunteer ball composed of sea green silk with quantities of foamy lace. Well, to proceed with my story, we started from the breakwater in excellent spirits. So many of our friends were with us that we felt quite at home, and there was no end of pleasant chat and laughter, and I and several of the others made some really good jokes soon after we started. But one cannot go on making jokes for ever, you know. I went on longer than most, but after a time somehow or other they fell flat—in fact, the last two or three were not taken notice of at all, so of course I did not make any more after that. Besides, I was feeling very sleepy (I had got up very early that morning). After a time nobody made any jokes except the second mate of the Mohaka. I felt an ungenerous joy in seeing that his too fell very flat, for they really were very poor ones, all about ‘casting up accounts’ and pale green complexions. I’m sure I for one could not understand one of them, and I don’t believe any of the others did either, for not a soul laughed. Well, after a while the Mohaka reached the Tauranga’s side, and we thought our troubles were over, comparatively speaking. But, alas ! they were not. The unmannerly tug appeared to be making giant efforts to go on board the man of war herself. The mountains she climbed in her eagerness would have astonished you. As for me, 1 felt quite indifferent to our fate. Some of the passengers felt anxious and frightened, but you know, my dear, I always was a bit of a philosopher ; and then getting up so early on Saturday morning had given me a bit of a headache, besides making me feel so sleepy. So I awaited my turn to climb the side with patience and fortitude—indeed, I don’t think I should have minded much if I had sunk beneath the wave never to rise again. This is how we boarded the Tauranga. We waited till the Mohaka had crested a mighty wave, and then we gave a mighty spring from her deck to that of the man of-war, and were received in the outstretched arms of a Jack Tar.

I don’t consider a man-of-war a very interesting object. I felt disappointed in this one, but then to be sure, I was lying down most of the time, as I still felt tired and sleepy. I did manage to see a few torpedoes and cannons, however. What vexed me greatly was that the officers and other people kept coming and asking me if they could do anything for me, and offering me biscuits and lemonade. They evidently had got the mistaken notion into their heads that I did not feel well. How they got it I cannot imagine, but such was their impression. It really was a relief for me when I reached terra fir ma again. Most of the officers were in town up at the cricket ground playing a match with our men, who, I regret to say, were badly beaten by over thirty points. In fact, I did so wish that I had stayed on shore and witnessed the match. I much prefer cricket to trips in the Mohaka. By-the-bye, cn passant, I may as well tell you I have abandoned my promised visit to Auckland for the present. I think I shall wait till the railway from that town to New Plymouth is completed.

Jane.