Sairey and the Women’s Club.

Fair Play, Volume I, Issue 17, 24 February 1894, Page 11

Sairey and the Women’s Club.

One afternoon last week, Mr. Heditor, I was siftin' crocherin’ in m3’ best parlor, when the bell rang, an’ Kate Deborah pernounced Mrs. Blank (3'ou will remember, Mr. Heditor, as Mrs. Blank was the lady as called the first meetin’ to discuss the formin’ of a Women’s Club). I got hup, an’ shuke my visitor corduahy by the hand, an' sa3 7 s ; “ Welcome, Mrs. Blank, I am rite glad to see ynu,"’ I sa3’s. ‘•Thank you, Mrs Snodgins,” she sa3 r s, “it does one good to receeve a genuine haivy welcome such as you give, after bein’ a little bit sickened by the Sossiety kiss, which nmy meen a little affeeshun or a little hatred,” she says. ■‘Oh, there’s none of that about me,” I sa3 r s, “as is a Lankashire lass an’ sa3’s just what I thinks is rite,” I says, but I continude, “ to what am I indetted for the pleasure of this visit'?” I says. “Well, to tell 3’ou the truth,” I says. “ to suggest that you, as President of the Women’s Club, should call a meetin’ to discuss the best method of raisin’ funds, framin’ rules an’ etc.” she sa3’s. “ I ’ave thort of it myself, butthort as I’d wate till everybody was back from there hollidays,” I says. “ I think all, or neerly all the ladies as was present at the last meetin’, are home,” she says. “ Very well, my deer,” I says, “ we will call a meetin’ as soon as possible," I says. “Let me see, to-day is Wednesday, next Friday is my day ‘ At Home.” Serposewe fix the meetin’ for that day “?” I says. “ That will do nicely, if it will not in* conveenience 3'ou,” she says. “Not at all, my deer,” I says, “as will be a good chance to make converts of any frends who may call,” I says, so after takin’ a cup of tea, Mrs Blank left, promisin’ to drop a line to the other ladies, invitin’ them to the meetin’. So on Friday afternoon, I felt in quite a flutter as 3 o’oclock drew neer, an’ just after the clock struck three the first visitor was pernounced, as proved to be Mrs Matildah Brown, the person as I named “ the Hopposishonist.” “ Good afternoon, Mrs Snodgins,” she says. “ Good afternoon, mem,” I says, “ I am glad to see you here, mem,” I says, “ as look as if you was quite reckonciled to the'Women’s Club idea now,” I says. “ Yes indeed, I am Mrs Snodgins an’ cannot think how I can ’ave been so foolish as to hoppose such a grand idea, but now as I am convinced as it will be a good thing for women, I shall devote all

my henergy to the hatanement of it,” she says. “ Well done,” I says, “ as it takes some moral courage to admit one is in the rong, after takin’ the stand you did,'' I says. Just then, some more ladies were showed in an’ soon the room was crouded, tea was handed round, an’ after seem’ everybody's wants was seen to I Btood hup, but before I could speek a burst of happlause greeted me, at wich 1 bowed my acknowledgement, an’ then began : “ Ladies, I was by our friend Mrs Blank, who let me tell you is a very true frond an’ will prove herself a corner stone of our Club when we get it (A vice : Yes, an’ before we get it) to call a meetin' to consider the best mecns of raisin’ the funds for buildin’ of the Club, the eleckshun of ossifcrs an’ etc., etc. (Heer, beer). Now, I am not goin’ to say very much, for I think as we had better make this a free-ati’-casy conversashonal sort of meetin’, an’ let everyone as is intrested ’nve her say in the matter. The raisin’ of the funds I shall say nothink about till some of our fronds, as know more about the matter, ’ave spoke, but I would like to make ono or two perposals as to the erlcckshon of ossifers, I says. In the first place then I should like to perpose Mrs Matildah Brown as seckretary, an’ Mrs Blank as treasurer, as both ladies is hentheuseastic,hencrgetic,an 1 weall,lam sure, think we could not do better than elect those ladies, that is if they will accept,” I says. “ I should like to second thatperposishon Mrs. President,” says the straight-backed, woman’s rites woman, with the green goggles, “ wich I does with the greatest plesure, an’ at the same, time Mrs. President, I should like to compliment you on your keen an’ sound judgment, as I know both these ladies well, an’ if they will accept the persishons, I am sure they could not be filled by persons more sootable,” she says.

“ Thank you for the component, mem,” I says, “ wich I think we musn’thiiululge much in,” I sayssmilin, “ as I ’avn’t time,” I says, “ so now those in favor, please hold hup there hands.” Every hand went hup an' then Mrs. Blank got up an’ says—- “ Mrs. President, ladies, I thank you on behalf of Mrs. Brown an’ myself, an’ beg to say we accept the persishons you offer us, an’ will do our best to further the interests of the Club. I am sure our President will understand that we shall needhassistants, an' so I beg to perpose Miss Eliza Green (the woman’s rites woman) and Mrs. Hawkius (the little thin-faced woman) at wich there was a grate clappin’ of handsNo need for that perposal to be seconded,” Mrs. Blank went on, “ as the approval is unionanimus, so I will, with our President’s permishon, say a word or too about the Buildin' Fund. I am afrade as we shall not find it all plane salein’, but we must ’ave plenty of courage, an’ hope to bekon us on, an' I feel sure we shall succeed. In the first place I think we

must look to homo for help, an’ thoso of us as ’ave husbings, brothers, brothers-in-law, undos, cousins, or grandfathers, must weedlo them inter puttin’ thero hands inter there pockets air pull in them out agon with one or moro golden kinos between there fingers. (Heer hoor.) Then, if tliere are any ladies as ’ave a house and land big enough she mito give a garden party, and like our Salvashun Army friends, take hup a eollocshun. (Lafftor and clappin’ of hands.) -Then I think as wo mito approaoli tho members Parliment, speshully the _ now ones as wants to keop all rite with tho ladies. (A voice—Bell; another, Stout.) Well, any of them, it does not mattor much so long as they hand us some bank notes. An' now I think I ’ave opened tho way to attainin’ our end, ’praps some other ladies would like to make some suggostshuns. “ I don’t know as I can oiler any suggostshuns, says our now treasurer, oxcopt the old ideas of raisin’ money by gettin’ Imp second rate concerts, bazars, ancle* slum sales, etc., but .1 can carry into effect one of our secretary’s suggostshuns, and so .1 herewith invite all members, intendin’ members, and there bushings, there sweethearts, brothers, cousins, uncles, and in fact all there rolaslmns an’ friends, as will of course bo invited to be as libera! ns posserhle, (lafftor,) an' by tho way, we mite ask a parson or too, ma,kin' sure wo got one as would make a helo(|iiont appeal. (Lafftor.) My house and grounds are situated outside tho city, an’ will acommordato some two or three hundred persons, so ladies, you will boner me by your presence.” (Sits down amid deffenm’ applause.) Then a silence for a few minits an’ 1 got up an' sayed, “ Is there any other lady wishes to speak ?” “ Let us heer what you ’ave got to say, Mrs. President,” says Mrs. Hawkins, “us i am sure I can say tliut all of us intend doin’ our little best towards the Bildin’ Fund.” “ Well, ladies, I don’t know as I ’ave got much to say, except to thank you for tho interest you aro alroddy takin’ in our club that is to be, nn’tlmt at no distant date, judgoin’ by the practical way our treasurer is showin' her interest, an’ iwr we seem so neerly realizin’ tho funds, I should like to suggest us ’avin a jimmynashum, for I thinks if wo is to ’avo heltliy active minds wo must ’uvo holtliy active bodies, so when we give tho arkitcct a sketch of what wo want, X hopes us we shall all be agreed that a “ jim” will be a part of the plan. An’ now, ladies, I thinks as we may congraterlate ourselves upon ’avin done a good day’s work, an’ the next meetin' will be callod to ascertano how much money we ’avo succeeded in wcedlin’ our male relaehunß an’-friends out of. The meetin’ then adjourned, so, Mr. Heditor, please prepare all 'Fair Play’ staff, aye, even unto the printer’s dovel, for the visit, with a plate m her hand, of Yours beggin’ly SAIREY SNODGINB.