THE PASSING SHOW

Waikato Times, Volume 127, Issue 21200, 24 August 1940, Page 11 (Supplement)

THE PASSING SHOW

COMMENT AND CRITICISM

The win of Taxpayer at Riccarton was called a surprise one. On the contrary, it seemed most fitting for a horse with such a name to pay a long price. The Berlin News Agency said that Spitfires rose over London like mosquitoes from a marsh. And can they sting! At school a boy was asked where the capital of England was. He should have got full marks for his answer for he said it was in the U.S.A. The United States says it could have an army of 2,000,000 in the field fully equipped by October, 1943. More to the point is how many it could have by October, 1940. If England went down, the United States would be left without a friend in the world, according to Colonel l£nox, Secretary to the U.S. Navy. But they would always have Colonel Lindbergh. * * * * “ Hey, what are you doing?” yelled the foreman. “ Just sharpening my pencil,” replied the bricklayer. “ Well, don’t let anybody see you—that’s a carpenter’s job.” A smart one told at a concert in England for Australian troops concerned 50 German pilots who knocked at the door of Heaven, “ Who are you? ” asked St. Peter. “We are 50 German pilots who were shot down by the British,” was the reply. The doorkeeper went away and came back soon afterward shaking his head. “ I have looked up the German official report,” he said, “ and there were only two of you shot down. You’ll have to go elsewhere.” * * * * American senators replied in characteristic style to Colonel Charles Lindbergh’s speech in support of Germany. Senator Claude Pepper denounced Lindbergh as “ the chief of the fifth column in this country.” Recalling that Goering bestowed a “ cross of recognition and merit ” cn Lindbergh, Senator Lee said: “ If Colonel Lindbergh had not earned the German medal when it was presented to him, he has earned it by now.” Senator Pepper, referring to Lindbergh’s collaboration in the development of a mechanical heart, said: “ This man knows more about a mechanical heart than about a human heart.” In his speech Lindbergh appeared to accept the Nazis as representatives of Western civilisation. “ If the Nazis are civilised,” retorted the Los Angeles Times. “ so are the Hottentots, and A 1 Capone is an exponent of Western culture.”

There are to be no Christmas crackers in England this year. That can be endured, but any attempt to replace Santa Claus by a little man with a black moustache will set up a howl among the Juvenile population. * * • • “ You men must keep your eyes skinned,” said a humourist at the concert for Australian troops in London this week, “ so that you can recognise enemy aeroplanes. It you see a machine with the propeller at the tail, flying rapidly backward, you’ll know that’s an Italian pursuit plane.” * * • * Possibly the tenderest railway conscience on record, according to the Manchester Guardian, was that of the traveller who remitted four shillings to the L.N.W. railway “ as reparation for going into a first-class waiting-room at one of the stations while holding only a third-clasa ticket.” Which reminds us of the man who pushed his head through the window and asked; “ Is this seat reserved? ” “ Very,” replied the traveller. “ It hasn’t said a word the whole way.” * * * • A German Messerschmitt pilot wa» forced down in a field in south-east England, jumped out of his machine uninjured and hailed farm workers, throwing up his arms and shouting in English; “ It’s all right. What about a pint of beer? ” When the fly in the jug Feels he's looking a mug, And gamely strikes out for the brink. Though likely to lose his Young life his excuse is “ I only dropped in for a drink.” So with faith unimpaired By Vie peril he’s shared, The Nazi from more will not shrink. When forced to bale out He will mirthfully shout “ I only dropped down for a drink.” London cable: A German parachutist (not a pilot) baled out over southern England and landed in an open space, which turned out to be the centre of the Canadians’ camp. Berlin News Agency; A German parachutist made a bold single-handed attack on the Canadian Expeditionary Force in broad daylight. Despite heavy fire from the ground and attacks by six Spitfires and a balloon barrage, he succeeded in landing on a carefully chosen spot. The Canadians immediately withdrew in disorder but rallied when the British Fleet appeared off the shore and began to bombard our parachutist. The latter held his ground and opened fire with his machine guns, killing 100 Canadians and wounding 307 before riding away on his collapsible bicycle. German bomber pilots saw London people fleeing in panic at his approach.

(By “Free Lance.”)