THE SEAMY SIDE.

Waikato Times, Volume 102, Issue 17133, 21 June 1927, Page 10

THE SEAMY SIDE.

TALES TO MAGISTRATE. AN INTIMIDATING MOUSTACHE. (By B. E. Corder, in London Daily Mail.) Mr Ivan Snell, one of the most sporting of magistrates, who sits al Old Street, Police Court, has grown a severe moustache which has an intimidating .effect on the daily feminine collection of applicants and offenders. Nobody, so far as I know, has ever tried to explain the dominating influence of the masculine moustache on the feminine temperament. But I am convinced that moustaches arc menacing. The only magistrates who can effectively silence and dismay women compelled to come to Court are Mr Boyd, of Westminster, and Mr Snell of Old Street, and they both wear moustaches. A woman in black told Mr Snell that she was just enjoying spring cleaning, and had begun to wash the paint down when her sister, who had no real home of her own, showed her jealousy by throwing a scrubbing-brush and a poker, both of which found their mark on the head of the applicant.

“I have lived with mother for 18 years,” said the injured daughter, “and my sister says I am behind the times. My husband objects to her trying to bring us up to date, and that is why she is angry." “ I don’t often interfere in family quarrels,” said Mr Snell, but I think you are justified in taking a summons.” “ My father does not realise I have grown up,” said a stalwart young woman. “ I am married, but he still thinks I ought to keep his house clean, and because I don’t go over he broke my door in and smashed my windows.” The daughter, who is also a wife, obtained a summons for wilful damage. A tall, well-built, placid, blonde woman, standing about sft 10 in height and weighing at least 13st, wept over the sins of her husband, sft 2in and Ost, who, she said, had bitten her on the arm. “ I have given him two chances,” she said, “ but he will bite.” “Give him another chance; he has been good for more' than a year,” urged the magistrate. “ Oh, very well, just one more chance,” agreed the substantial blonde. And there is the difference. I have never known a slender brunette give anybody a second chance. George Rowe is a youngish man who has had a long run for somebody elsc’s money. Mr Clarke Hall, the senior magistrate at Old Street, has given him .every chance. ,

He has enjoyed long periods in hospital, and although he has been detected in the act of robbing gas meters, he has escaped gaol. He declares he is an invalid, but recently it took four policemen to prevent him from lighting with another man.

“ He won’t go to the Salvation Army hostel,” said the court missionary, “ and he says he is unable to work, but he has had every chance.” ‘‘l don’t like the Salvition Army,” said George Rowe. “ Indeed,” remarked Mr Snell. “You are dishonest and a nuisance. You have been spoiled by kindness. Let us see what punishment will do—one month’s hard labour.”

George Howe, who could not wmrk, hut who had sufficient vigour to Resist four policeman, actually thought he had a grievance when he was sent to prison. He had been treated so long as a brand to be snatched from the burning that he began to look upon himself as a professional bad example posing as a model offender for the whitewash brush.

But he had the bad luck to meet Mr Snell with a new moustache rampant.