THE SCOT ABROAD.

Waikato Times, Volume XXXIX, Issue 3151, 3 September 1892, Page 1 (Supplement)

THE SCOT ABROAD.

An Englishman, went out to the East as an interpreter, his ruling passion being a hatred of everything Scotch. Strolling through the camp with a Turkish officer, and abusing the ScotGh to his heart's content, to his astonishment Hassan Bey, the Turk, broke out, " I'll tell ye whaat ma mon, gin ye dour lows yere tongue upon my country like thaat I'll gie ye a cloot on the lug that'll mak' it tingle fra this to Hallo we'n!" The thunderstruck Englishman stammered out, "Why, my good man, I thought you were a Turk! " " And sae I am a Turk the noo, ma braw chiei," said the angry Glasgow Mussulman, " but my feither's auld leather breeks ne'er travelled farther than just fra Glasgow to Greenock and back again, but when I gang home—as I'll do for it's lang, if it be God's will—l'll just beWully, Forbes, son o' auld Daddy Forbes, o' the Gorbals, for a' that's came an' gaue ! " Presently a splendidlydressed Hungarian came up, and said to die Turk. ■' Wully, mon, there's a truce the noo for twa hours ; just come wi' me, and we'll

hae a glass o' whusky thegithor." It was tne same with the Russian officer, until the Englishman exclaimed "Bless my heart! is everybody on earth a Scotchman ? Perhaps I'm one myself without knowing it ?" But when the Russian general, Tarassoff, exclaimed, "Eli, Donald Cawmell! are ye here r" and Ibrahim Pasha burst forth simultaneously. " What, Sandy Robertson, can this be you ?" the Englishman burst forth, "Its all over. The Turks, Russians, Hungarians, Englishman—all Scotchmen ! It's more than I can bear ! I shall go home; there's nothing left for me to do here. I came out as an interpreter, but if all the nations of Europe talk nothing but Scotch, what use can Ibe ?" This seems very droll, but it is not more droll than real.