CHIFFONS FROM PARIS. (TRANSLATED FROM LE FIGARO.)

Waikato Times, Volume XXII, Issue 1797, 12 January 1884, Page 2 (Supplement)

CHIFFONS FROM PARIS. (TRANSLATED FROM LE FIGARO .)

Such is life. The Aryan house-father (and a pillar of the church to boot) to his daughter : ''Where are we going this evening, Mary? To the Bishop's lecture on the Christy Minstrels ? To the leoture, isn't it ? " " Yes, papa — to the Christy Minstrels." 11 Oh, yes, of course, that's what I meant I "

In a village. Jones — " It is a grand time, Mr. Brown 1 " ' Brown — " Oh, aye ! a grand time, a glorious time 1 In faot I've not seen such a happy time Bince" (considers a moment) "since the death of my wife I " Jones (somewhat perplexed, but feeling the necessity of saying something) — " Aye ! aye 1 "

The following new rendering of an old story appears in an old Italian author : "Hercules meets, at a cross-road, two women equally beautiful, but in different styles. The one is called Virtue and the other Pleasure. They point to roads going in opposite directions, and each invites the hero to accompany her. Hercules, much perplexed, for they were equally beautiful, and he loved them both at sight, at length said : " Yes, you are both right ; but there is a third road — let us all take that ; and I will have the pleasure of accompanying you both without being impolite to either." After some hesitation this compromise was agreed to ; and, perhaps, this moral fable accounts for the fact that now we seldom meet a man who is either a complete sinner or a perfect saint.

A musical composer, author of a rather tiresome work, repeats modeßtly the expression of Hozarfc, Apropos of Don Giovanni : "It is an opera which I have written for myself and my friends." Upon which a friend remarks with a sigh : " For his friends ? Yes, that is the unkind part of it!"

SCENE — THE 'BUS OEFIGE. A passenger to his friend : "I should like to have a ten-pound note for every idiot who asks for a ticket to Batignolles when he wants to go to the Odeon." Then, addressing the ticket clerk — " A ticket for Batignolles, please." "But," says his friend, "I thought you wanted to go to the Odeon ? " " By Jove, so I do ! "

The Duke of V , speaking ofshis youthful son to the Marquis of T , a very sceptical and cynical old gentleman : "Jean is a very nice lad, but he annoy 3 me very much. Just imagine it : He seems to be laying himself out to copy the style and manner of my head coachman 1 " The Marquis (horrible old ruffian) : "Eh I the young rascal 1 He evidently aspires to success with ladies of fashion ! "