Varieties

Western Star, Issue 143, 3 June 1876, Page 7

Varieties

Good Country Butter.—A ratn. Woman’s Degrees.—Fair, fairer, fairest. There is one thing that can always bo found—that’s fault. What is taken from you before you get it? Yaur photograph. Men horn blind can’t he carpenters, because they never saw. If your wife is good, kiss her for reward. If she. isn’t, kiss her for punishment. 1 What is the interior of Africa principally used for ?’ asked a teacher of a pupil. * For purposes of exploration,* was the reply. There is nothing that will show the force and force and intensity of a woman’s scream so well as a mouse running across the floor, General Trumbull is looking for the proof reader of a certain Western paper, The general was announced to deliver a lecture on ‘ Irish Pratiesj’ when it should have been * Irish Parties.’ A loving heart and a pleasant countenance are commodities which a man should 'never fail to take home with him. They will best season his food and soften his piilpw. It were a great thing JLor a man that his wife and children could truly of him, ‘Ho never brought a frown or unhappiness across his threshold.* Douglas Jerrold said oho 'day that he would make a pun upon anything his friends would put to him., A friend asked whether he could pun upon the signfc of the Zodiac, to which he promptly replied, ‘ By Gemini, I Can-cor!’ y jhnuary is considered an unfortunate marrying month. It is said that a girl was asked in the month of October to unite herself in the silken tie to a lad, who named January in his proposals. The lady tenderly hinted that January was an unlucky month for n arrying. * Well, it February then,’ honestly replied the ■wain, anxious to accommcdal». The damsel paused a moment, hesitated, cast down her eyes, and said, with a blush, ‘ Wouldn’t December do as well P,