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Woodville Examiner, Volume XXI, Issue 3570, 26 June 1903, Page 1 (Supplement)

Observer: “The principal ingredient in these patent medicines is the same.’” Friend: “It must be a powerful drug. What is if.'” .Observer: “'Priffter’s ink.” “You ought not to beg,” she said. “No, ma’am,” admitted the tramp. “Why do you. do it?” “Well, ma’am, I wouldn’t if I could get people to give me money by just looking sad.” “Of course,” said Mite Gotrox’s lover. “I realise that your daughter is an heiress; but I assure you that I would he just as anxious to marry her if she were a pauper.” “Tliat settles you,” replied her father. “We don’t want any such fools in this family.” “I suppose,” said the physician, smiling, and trying to appear witty, while feeling the pulse of a lady patient, «I suppose you consider me an old humbug.” “Why doctor,” replied the lady, "I had no idea you could ascertain a woman's thoughts by merely feeling her pulse!”