MATRIMONIAL ADVERTISING.

West Coast Times, Issue 1326, 22 December 1869, Page 4

MATRIMONIAL ADVERTISING.

A lady, who had no idea of looking for a hnsband. but "with large proclivities for mischief and for fun, put a matrimonial advertisement in the Neiv York Herald, with direction for answers to be sent to a certain signature at the Broadway Post Office. As the advertisement appealed to the practical appreciation, by assuming a neat little fortune, in addition to an agreeable person, the seed of such temptation could not well fall idly upon such a fertile bottom as is offered by the city of New York. On the first day that succeeded the advertisement, the lady received seventeen

replies ; on the second day, thirty-two ; and on the third, seventy-two, an extent and ardour of appreciation for her vaguely described personal attractions which even she was not prepared to expect. Bewildered by the warm volume of adoration

and entreaty which issued from this hymenial magazine, the lady called to her aid five ladies as mischievous as herself. One pair of hands and one mind were, of course, quite unequal to the task of answering all, so the billet cloux were divided equally among them, and each was to make an appointment with the writers on the following Saturday afternoon at four o'clock on the lower side of the upstairs saloon of a certain popular restaurant in Broadway. Each of the ladies, moreover, who took the task in charge, chose a different colour paper for replies. Finally, it was agreed that the whole six should be present at the interview, and that each should wear the exact costume prescribed for the inamorata whom the singing swans would be' there to see. On the other hand, the gentlemen were directs d to appear in all the varieties of attire and position wl.i;h female ingenuity and mischief could devise. One was requested to wear a blue coat and brass buttons ; another to have his hair parted in the middle; one was to be eating a plate of pork &nd beans, which, said the ingenious writer who dictated it, " you can scarcely expect will be called for by anybody else." Others were to he partaking of various dishes, or to place themselves in such postures as were directed by the writer. At four o'clock on the prescribed Satur-day-afternoon every chair at every, table on the' lower side of the upstairs saloon was filled with sleek-looking and highly perfumed Leanders, all gazing into, each othfer's -faces, and each secretly cursing the luck which wedged him so closely out of the killing position and displays which he had been' meditating ever since he got his note. And how the dishes, smoked, and the wondering waiters- flew! . Even the perplexed landlord, amazed at this miraculous flow of business, was obliged to drop bis own mutton-chop, and call out the entire force of his establishment to meet the clamorous, if not threatening, demands of gentlemen, who feared they might not get their telegraphing plates of duck, or mess of pork and beans, in time. At length, the clash of shejen a^d r kjck^ of stiff skirts Was heard coming up the stairs one minute after the hour, and an inamorata appeared, dressed" ia^ dark -green,, "frith "deep fur cape, and abundant drooping !*<*, Sfc« was wafered, TO ffcf IJBCK of

the head with an infinitesimal bonnet, and carried in her hand the magic rift of cambric, whose Shakespearean strawberries- intimated that she was she. When she appeared the sensation was universal ; the. gentleman with the buff vest threw open his coatjto the 'extreme, the gentleman in the "blue" and the bright buttons, buttoned his cqat , entirely to thechin ; the gentleman who was to lean backward, frequently commenced tilting like a Chinese mandarin ; the gentleman with the pork and beans became vociferous for more beans ; while those who had duck, &c, were equally clamorous in complaining of the undue fulfilment of their orders. Never was there such a clamour heard in that usually well regulated upstairs saloon before, and, by-thc-bye, never subs : ded more suddenly than when a new brush ofskirts was heart coming up the stairs.^ All the Lotharios were once more in position, wrpn, lo ! another Cordelia, in all respects the reflex of the first, appeared, bearing the fil.-n of strawberries as a challenge in her hand, and sweeping with it like a Juno to a seat near the location of the first. It is needless to say that the sensation was now extreme. Some of the gentlemen who were to part their hair in the middle began, however to look less^ furiously at other gentlemen who had their hair parted the same way, as much as if to say, " Well, there is one for each of us, anyhow !" But most of the -party seemed more troubled than before. A pause of some minutes succeeded before any new " appearance " took place, during which time the Lothario? were engaged in displaying their points to the best advantage; and some, more ardent than the rest, pulled out. the various colored notes they had received, and either pretended to read them, or laid them conspicuously en the table. " There's one of my fellows with a blue note !" said mystery No. 1, over her spoonful of soup, to mystery No. 2, " There's one of mine," said Cordelia the second ; " he's got a pink note." " What do you think of Augustus there, with the pork and beans, who is so pensively leaning his cheek upon his hand ?" said myth the first ; but before the answer could be given, apparitions three and four appeared, and hard upon their heels came five and six. There was now perfect consternation on the lower side of the up-stairs saloon of the fashionable restaurant in Broadway. The man of tilt fell backward?, and was shot under the table ; there was a general feeling after hats, and a gathering up of loose handkerchiefs aud canes. All at once, after one of those sharp, sudden panics, which convey electric knowledge to the human mind, a general stampede took place, and the whole party with more or les3 dignity — according to the nature and shapes they had assumed— •nvule for the stairs, and descended out of sight. It was several minutes before they could hand in their checks and pay their score, and during all this time the mischievous bevy with strawberry marked hankerchiefs, took full pay for thetr trouble in the hearty laugh which they indulged in at the ludicrous iableau and exodus they had just beheld on the part>ot the gentlemen who were so sharp after the "snug little fortune," and whose motives were entirely confined to the object of getting a " congenial partner with whom they could quietly settle dowii down in \iiv:

C.U'Tube in? a nairn— We (Overland Mail) understand that a piratical junk was captured ,on the West Coast, hear Haw-chWa Island, on the 7th October, by H.I.C.M . ynn-vesaei L-nen-to, Commander Edwards, .vtui* cruising m search of traces of the pirsas. 1 «m were concerned in the attack oa tites N. It. barque Apenrade. The following as an account of his proceedings : — The juns was overhauled at 1 o'clock in. the aiternoon, and as she presented a jnujpicioua appearance was hailed and ordered, to iie-to. This order not being obegrssfl, s musket shot was fired through J> ~*x without producing any effect. A second shot was fired, and ,\vas immediately responded to by a broadside fiom the junk's guns. The challenge, decidedly plucky under the circumstances, brought Sir W. Armstrong's handiwork into operation, but the crew of the junk, who were estimated at from, seventy to eighty strong, and who were well supplied with rifles and revolvers, continued, nevertheless to show fight very boldly. The Chinese sailors (firemen) of whom to the number of about sixty, the crew of the Chento is composed, behaved very courageously, and showed themselves excellent marksmpn. The action was prolonged by the difficulty of hitting so low an object as the junk in the motion caused by a chopping sea, but a shell from the Chento's piviot gun decided the fight, and the majority of the pirates throwing their arms overboard, swam for the shore, which was not far distant. The boats of the Chento, under the command of Mr Robertson, chief officer, at once board the junk, when a hand to hand fight took place on her deck between the Chento's party and such of the pirates as had not got away in time. Several were shot down— one man being knocked over in the act of setting fire to the magazine — and four prisoners were taken unhurt. It was found that the pirates bad lost some 18 cir 20 killed, the bodies of seven or eight of whom were found on the junk's deck. From information received at Macao, whither the prize was towed en route to Canton, there is reason to believe that the junk combined Coolie-catching with her other avocations. When encountered by the Cheuto she was bound, according to the prisoners' statement, from the coa s >t| of Hainan — the well-known cruising ground of both pirates and kidnappers. The only casualty reported on board the Chento is one Chinese fireman, the knuckle of whose right hand was splintered by a rifle bullet. The Chento herself received several rifle shots, and has two shots through the funnel, but on the whole suffered very little in the affair. Her commander speaks in the highest terms of the conduct of his officers, both executive and civil, and crew. The successful result of this engagement — the first actual standup fight between pirates and one of the new Chinese gunboats, shows that there is really good stuff in the native seamen when led and encouraged by the example of European officers, no matter how few in number. The complement of European officers on board the Cbento, including two engineers, is but seven all told.