GLEANINGS.

West Coast Times, Issue 574, 27 July 1867, Page 4

GLEANINGS.

The grain that is up earliest — sun-ryes. How much does a fool weigh generally ?—? — A simple-ton. What part of a ship is good for Youngsters ? — The spanker. Why is a laundress like an insult ?—Because she gets up your collar. Be content with enongh : — You may butter your bread until you are unable to eat it. The Burglar's Companion. — How to bone anything locked up, TTse a skeleton key.

Perhaps the best pun of this generation of lawyers was made by Lord Colonnay. A shoemaker of Aberdeen had fallen into a fortune, after having fallen into a great many misfortunes, chiefly from feminine causes. He sought to divorce his •wife, and she sought to divorce him, and in the various suits some L2OOO was spent. Lord Deas, during a dispute about the wife's expenses, asked, " How would this shoemaker have got justice if he had been obliged to stick to his last?" The Lord President instantly answered, "He would have required to have spent his awl."

OLD LETTERS.

" A box of sweetest music is that case, Filled with the song of those who sing no more,

Save in the records of this sacied store, By their dead hand-marks. Ah, what cher-

ished grace, With pale-vained echo floats across the space Of Time's encroaching sea, as slowly o'er I turn the sparkling paper, and restore Love's fragments to their old familiar place ! Yet seldom have I needed to unfold Thoae outer leaves which keep the thoughts apart, For mostly hath a glance my memory told Of all within, so, like the electric smart, Let but" the hand the fading scripture hold, And all its spirit rushes on the heart."