A BATCH OF HOWLERS

Wanganui Chronicle, Volume 83, Issue 68, 22 March 1939, Page 3

A BATCH OF HOWLERS

f£HE UNIVERSITY CORRESPONDENT, the organ of the University Correspondence College of Cambridge, publishes its annal list of “howlers” and mistakes. Some of the examples given are:— “ ‘Lords and Commons are the places where cricket Is played.’ ‘Moths can’t grow big because they only eat holes.’ : “ ‘ln Holland they use water power | to drive their windmills.’ I “‘A virgin forest is one where the ! hand of man has never set foot.’ i “ ‘lnventors make all the money. : Take cleaners. I am sure Mr. Vacuum I has cleared millions.’ I “ ‘During the French Revolution 1 many nobles were gelatined.’ j “‘Cars are run by eternal combusI tion engines.’ “ ‘He died of a painful melody.’ “ ‘Silence is what you don’t hear | when you listen.’

1“ ‘Defoe was really a journalist, but he could write.’ “ ‘What do you understand by the ’ Theory of Exchange? The Theory of ; ' Exchange, as I understand it, is not I very well understood.’ > j “‘A siren is a girl you often hear ' singing at a factory.’ r I “ ‘Compliment is when you say some- ' thing to someone which he and we r 1 know isn’t true.’ I “ ‘Use the words cool and collected jI in a sentence. “The man was cool , before the accident, but he was col- ’ lected afterwards.” ’ i “‘A lifeboatman must possess great courage, a spirit of self-sacrifice, and i a waterproof.’ “Tn the boat there are eight men - I and one to coax them.’ i “ ‘Double dealing is when you buy something wholesale to sell retail.’ r . “ ‘Henry VIII. was not good at j husbandry.’