HUMOUR

Wanganui Chronicle, Volume 79, Issue 306, 28 December 1936, Page 10

HUMOUR

? Woman (at the Golden Gates): I have ;«come to join my husband.” St. Peter: “Delighted to meet you, ma’am. What was your husband’s name? “Joseph Smith.” “I'm afraid that will not be sufficient for us to identify him. You see, strange as it may seem, we have quite a lot of Joseph Smiths up here. Are there nin other means by which you can identif; him!” “Well, before he died he told me that if ever I kissed another man he would turn in his grave.” “Oh! 1 know the chap. Up here we call him Whirling Joe! ”

ig lipstick to the last moment!

Murphy was paying twenty-eight shillings a week board and lodging. One day his landlady said: ‘“Pat, I'm afraid J shall have to charge you another two shillings. You're such p big cater. ” “For heaven's sake don’t do that!” said Murphy. “I'm killin’ myself already tryin’ to ate twenty-eight shil - lin s’ worth! "

“Hands up .. . and don't move!'

I’hc village giocer was interviewing applicants for the post, of messenger boy. To each one he put searching J questions to make sure that the boy .would take an interest, in his work. I “Well, my lad,” lie said to one bright-looking youth, “what would vou do with a thousand pounds?” j The lad scratched his head. : "I don’t know, sir,” he replied. “1 didnt expect so much for a start.”

“What did 1 tell you! We should never have let Jim see that Indian film! ”

Good Guess They were discussing North Amen can Indians in a rural school when Ho teacher asked if anyone knew what tie leaders of the tribes were called. “Chiefs,” answered one bright gii “Correct. Now can anyone tell n what the women were called?” There was silence for <1 while, an then a small boy raised his hand. | “Well, Frankie, what is it.”’ | ‘Mischiefs,” he announced piomll'.

. and how is that sweet liti. boy of yours getting on?”

Mr H. W. Whanslaw, who has ;• marionette theatre at Chiswick, relate how the revival was started JO yearago by an exhibition got together bv himself and Mr Gerald Morice. As a result of this the guil ' was founded; and it has reached a membership of 500.