AMUSING LITTLE JOAN

Wanganui Chronicle, Volume LXXXIII, Issue 19846, 21 May 1927, Page 16 (Supplement)

AMUSING LITTLE JOAN

(Written for the “Chronicle.”) “You’ll amuse little Joan for a while, won’t you dear?” said my wife. “You sec nurse is out. and I have some shopping to do. I won’t be long, but don’t let her cry; if once she starts you’ll never be able to stop her.” As a matter of fact I was quite aware of that —previous experience, you sec—but I am equal to almost any emergency, so I smiled sweetly as Joan was brought in to me. “What shall we play dear?” I asked. “Lions!” was the solemn answer That seemed quite simple to me; to crawl along on all fours is one of my daily inducing exercises. But apparently my method was too mild fcr Joan. “You’ve forgotten to roar,” she reminded ine. So I roared. It must have been too realistic, as she shrunk back for a moment, and I had visions of waterworks and whatnot. Then a bright idea! “Shall we play tigers then?” I asked. “Tigers don’t roar” she questioned. “No” was my grateful answer. “But they jump” said she, firmly.

Now, daily exercise keeps me in excellent trim, but hopping around like a tiger is quite another matter. At each bound my joints cracked and my breath came in shorter supply, but Joan was delighted. “More” she demanded. I dare not desist, but the strain was growing too great and so I put forth another suggestion: “What about gee-gees? You can ride.”

‘ ‘ Let’s ’ ’ she answered, for this was a favourite game of hers—when she could find a steed. Joan climbed aboard and off I started round the floor. But even now I was harried. “Quicker” demanded the tyrant, and soon I was shambling along at a good trot, but even this was not enough. In a few minutes Gloaming had nothing on me, and I dashed past the winning post (this time a table leg) like a champion. This burst of speed was too much though, and so I suggested that we should leave animals out of it and play ball instead. This was certainly not so interesting to Joan, but the sight of a big ball bouncing across the room cheered her up, and so we started. This was a relief —all I had to do was to throw it, and Joan would retrieve it and send it back. Still, I had to stoop, and after my recent cavortings, it was not a pleasant action. “Keep her going on this” I thought, “and I am safe till rescue arrives.”

My wife came in, and after an anxious look at Joan smiled at me. “I see you must have got on quite well without me” she said, as I sank into a chair.

“Well. Joan dear!” she inquired. “Please Mumsie may I sit down?” was the response. “I’m so tired. Daddy wanted to play and I been ’musing him. ’ ’ Never again.—R.L.R.