PUNCH IN CANTERBURY.
This is a New Zealand imitation of the shrewd and witty Fleet-street publication, and the first number augurs well for its being a genial and laughter-provoking exposer of follies and abuses, political and social. Most of the allusions in the first number are to local politics. The following is the PREFACE. Scene: 85 Fleet Street. Mr. Punch with a map of the British colonies and a cup of coffee before him. Enter to him The Right Honorable Edward Cardwell, M.P. MR. PUNCH.—Be quiet, Toby. Sit down, Cardwell. And what is it ? Mr. O. —The Colonies, worthy Punch Mr. P.—Don’t be too familiar. But go on. Mr. G. —Form a most interesting study. Mr. P. —Have you found that out already, Mr. Secretary ? I have had some trouble in impressing the fact on your predecessors. Mr. C. —At the present moment, for instance, the news from New Zealand—Mr. P. —ls perfectly familiar to me ; so be brief. Mr. C. —There is a war there. Mr. P. —l told poor Newcastle that five years ago. Don’t be tiresome. Mr. G. —The settlers and the natives are Mr. P. —Enemies, through Colonial Office stupidity. Mr C. —The Colonists themselves are Mr. P. —Englishmen, for the most part. There are 170,000 of them in New Zealand ; and Thirty Millions of the same sort in Great Britain. Mr. C. —Possibly you are aware that gold has been found there in abundance ? Mr. P. —Gabriel’s Gully, July, 1861 ; see my almanac and come to the point. Mr. C. —At.the West Coast Mr. P. —Will be the richest field of all. Tell your people so from me. Mr. G. —Considering these circumstances, Sir, would it not be worthy of an illustrious Sovereign, and a no less illustrious Personage— Mr. P. —Meaning the Queen and me ? You are right to he respectful. Mr. C. —That the inhabitants of so important a country should possess a share of the privileges which Britons enjoy within their native and ? For instance—good government and Mr. P. —Let them govern themselves, and don’t you meddle. Mr. G. —And our protection Mr. P. —Let them defend themselves, and don’t you meddle! Mr. G. —And the hallowing influence of a higher civilisation. Mr. P. —Very fine words for so practical a man as Mr. Secretary. But they have our literature and some of our writers of fiction. Mr. G .—Sir George Grey, K.C.8., the Governor — Mr. P. —Whose Treasury draughts, and exquisite skill in the duplex manipidation of intricatesubjects—as,he \vould say himself—have gained him a high reputation as an artist. Mr. G. —The Right Revereud Bishop Selwyn Mr. P. — Whose peculiar genms for the embellishment of Aboriginal Subjects entitles him to the rank of poet. Mr. G. —Lieut. -G eneral Sir Duncan Cameron K.C.B. Mr. P. —Slow. But his recent works have caused much innocent amusement among the coloured inhabitants. Mr. G .—What more is wanting but that the Monarch of Civilisation himself Mr. P. —You mean me ; I accept the compliment. But the work is already done. Take my private telegraph, and give Sir George and your other friends my instructions, from week to week—and as a model, send them—( takes up a paper) —Punch in Canterbury, No. 1.
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Bibliographic details
Wanganui Chronicle, Volume 9, Issue 503, 29 April 1865, Page 4
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538PUNCH IN CANTERBURY. Wanganui Chronicle, Volume 9, Issue 503, 29 April 1865, Page 4
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