PITHY PARS.

Waipawa Mail, Volume XXXVII, Issue 7917, 11 August 1917, Page 4 (Supplement)

PITHY PARS.

WHY ONLY JACK

‘Yes, father dear,” cooed tl trancing vision of femininity breakfast table. “Jack did Co ‘L ai last night after tennk didn’t you tell us that the gard had been newly-painted!? ]j j the poor boy didn’t meet anvon! he went from here!” “Why, my dear?” “Because,” she replied. . notice the new paint, and' Jack 1 trousers covered with tl, ft f stuff!” * A neighSourlyturk “Good morning, madam,” Polite gentleman interviewing Grubbins. “I have been reoonJL hero .by some of your neighbour give me to understand that ivJ a daughter who sings a lot.” J “Oh, yes, sir, very kind of tk deed!” delightedly agreed! Mr i bins. "Am I right in smmisiJ that you are some operatic o ( . n in sealrch of such talent as mvd», possesses?” J “ “Well, no,” replied the polite a man. “I’m an inspector of publf ance?.” FROM BAD TO WORSE Mistress (discussing housemaid had given notice) : “ Well, 0 f (t)la she wants to go she must. But it, f oolis'h of her if her only reisont she wants 11 change. She, won’t j better place than this, ©ook ” “That’s just what I tell her,, Depend upon it,’ I says to for only be going out of the frviinr J the fire.’ ” AN ARAB PROVERB, lie who knows not, and know*, knows not; he is a fool. Shunt Ho who knows not and km* knows not; he is simple. IVaclil Ho knows, and knows know >; he is aoleep. Waken k He who knows, and knows foi ho is wise. Follow him. Besides being a proverb, it tongue-twister. Try it. An elderly lady of very prj, severe aspect wots seated next young couple, who were discuss* merits 01 their motor-car;. “ What colour is your body?"] tllo young man of twe girl at ki meaning, of course, the bodjj motor. “Oh, mine i:s pink. What inn “Mine,” replied the man, with wide yellow stripes.” This was too much for the old Rising from the table, she exclaim “ \\ lien young people come toi each other the colour of their W a dinner-party, it is time I let room.” Bobby, for once, expressed gn terest 111 the sermon. '‘Fancy machines being mentioned it Bible!” he said. “But are they?” “ Why, didn't the vicar say Eu lib heirship. to his brother Jacob! Mabel: “My dearest Olga, 1 not rest until 1 had come and mi effort to diispel the gloomy tiu which, to judge from your lettfl terday, threatened to develop id cidal mania. ‘Tfs true Alfred k you—the wretch. Still, try to* a sensible girl and look out for 11 engagement.” Olga): “ Your advice conies tm darling.” “Good gracious, Olga! You 1 haven’t taken poison?” "Well, n-n-110; the fact is, 1-4 canio engaged again yesterday." She (after breaking the wish-b “What did you wish?” He: “ 1 wished that you wod me kiss you. What did you wii .S/he : “ I .wished tjhat <*liij wished would come true.” “Annie,” called Mrs. Hiramfq foot of the. stairs, “how a bout) fast?” “*)h,” replied the new servant had overslept herself, “ye a trouble to bring me anny. I ainl hungry this mornin’.” An aged dame was chatting wounded Anzac. On learning ■ man hkifcled from New Zealand, tl* lady at once ventured the i>UU that, no doubt, the soldier v* to lie sojourning in England’s mon ial c'jm itc. “Oil, but New Zealand has*l mild climate,” replied the soldier, ing. The old dame ,vhook her head, cqn’t make me believe tliat. my sh e mi id, in a gentle hut reproval “for I know perfectly well that* where the frozen meat come, fro* “Tell me,” said a Sunds.G teaeher to her class, “ where do toys and girls go 10. who do « their pennies in the collection^! “Please, m’m,” said one litd “to the cinema.” Gigg: “The bridegroom look* but tiro bride’s father has « face.” _ Wigg: “I don’t wonder, l* blessed to give than to receive