To a, Mule.

Tuapeka Times, Volume XXIV, Issue 1905, 18 June 1892, Page 1 (Supplement)

To a, Mule.

O mule 1 Thou gaunt, grave, gawky Gatlicg gun On fours ! Thou lank, embodied lightning streak, All hail 1 (Be careful, Musaa, of hia heels.) Thy drooping ears ana languid eye, Mo3t subtle beast, might well breed confidence, But thou shalt not obliquely launch thy heels At me, thou wily rogue I Great Scott ! How I have sometimes seen th' unwary youth 02 Atrican descent hoist heavenward, Contorted, writhing, by the merciless hoof 1 Then thou wouldst turn thy luriog, blinkiDg eye To gaze upon the melanoholy work, Or lure with basilisk glanoe some viatic? new. 0 mule ! Star maker I Dealer in pyroteohnio novelties I Thou verily art loaded, cooked, and primed, From early morning till the steps 01 dewy duak imprint tbo sky with Btaiß, I would not draw within The magic circle of thy cognisant heela For all the yellow gold that Snaeta yields, Or silken freights that hither swim fromlnd. Mrs- Thomson (to new maid): "Bridget, you did not put quite enough tea in the pot; this cup of tea is very weak." Bridget : " Indade, mnm 1 Faith and Oi did put morn enough tay in the pot, but Oi think Oi must ay put a little too much wather in it." "I do not think, madam," said a husband, when taking hia wife to task, "that any man of tho least eenae would approve of youroonduot in that matter." " Sir," eho repliad, "perhaps you aro the best judge of what poodle of the leaafe sense would do." Exceedingly Long Patient: "I soy, dootor, are yuu going to put that mustard plaster on my leet to draw the pain from my head?" Dootor: "Yes; why?" " Well, I object. I'd rather have it where it is than drawn down through six feet and five incheß of new territory." Mr. Clarence Knowles and a friend were walking along when they passed a shoemaker's shop, over which was the name, "A. Sherry." " Good name that," said Mr. Knowles, "for a cobbler." When it ia one minute after eight o'clock it ia past eight. When it is thirty minutes paat eight it is only half-past eight. Here is another discovery to make the world pause and feel &ad. They were at the masquerade, where Bbs recognised him at once. " Was it the loud beating of my heart, my darling, that told you I was heie ?" "Ob, no," she replied, "I recognised youe crooked legs." -, v It may be of some oonseqnence To some one if we say, Tbe man has certaiDly horse sentsa Who knows when to cay neigh !. " This is my hour of knead," said the cook, as he began to work the dough.