CARL DUNDER.

Tuapeka Times, Volume XXIV, Issue 1890, 23 April 1892, Page 2 (Supplement)

CARL DUNDER .

He Begins to Understand Amerioa a Little Better.

'' Hello, Mr. Dunder I I thought you had hung yourself cr gone back to Germany," saluted Ssrpennt B -ndall a3 Carl Dundor entered the Woodbridge Street Station. " Sergeant, I v.has pooty near all right now," was the rer/ly. " I understands all about her much ptttsr a&lt I did." " That's good. Anything new ?" " Veil, vp co werry mooeb. I learn to understand ibis country a keOlo mcro eofery day. 1 vhas pooty green yen I first come hcie, eh?" " I should remark f" "Everybody makes some fools of me all due time, und I va9 discouraged. I vhas hayseeds, eh?'' '• Yes, you were." " Und more ash one million flics vhan me ?" '• Yea." " Uu<i I vhas so grean dot cowo like to ma oop?' 1 '• Exactly." " Veil, dot makes me l.iugh yen I th about her, but my eye-teeth vhss all out now. I vhaß on to all der games now," "Ibsg." " A feller cornea into my place two days ago to raako me his wictim. I spotted him co queek you can't wink. He sajs he likes to show raa a new puzzle. It vhas oalied : { Now you see him und now you dosn' see her.' He taken her shack of spades, der ace of hearts und der qaeen of club 3 und throws, 'em all around, uud den likes to bit me I can't pick out dot aback. Ipi ok him out fife times right off, und dot feller Bays I vhas lightning.'" "But you didn't bet?" "Ob, no." "It was lucky you didn't. That puzzle, 83 you call it, is the old threc-csrd monte business. I warned you about that a year ago." " Oh, ha doan' catch mo on dot. If he belief I vhaß a Buoker he finds out deeferenfc. But I vbaa a leedle mixed oop, und I like you to oxplain." " All right— what ia it V "In about two hours later an oldt man mit a white beard comes in und Bays vhaß I Carl Dunder ? I vhas. 1 vhaß werry glad to see you, Mr. Dunder, I hear about you. Eaferybody Bays you vhaa sharp as some razors. Did some young man come in here mit a puszlo ? He did. Did he beat you ? Not much! Veil, aot vbas all light. He vH&3 a sharper, und it he doan' beat you dob makes me laugh— ha Ihalha I" " And I suppose you set up the beer?' f queried the Sergeant. " Veil, if he vhas my friendt I like to use him nice, you know. Pooty soon he sits down und pulls out three cards und says he oxplain dot puzzle. He throws 'em so und co uad bo, Etnd den tp.Ha me I can pick out dec 6h«.ofc of spades. I jat my finger on dot shaok, und dot old man. says I vhas shainlightning." " And you tried it again, of course ?" " Yes, I pick dot shack ondt four timeß." " And then ?" " Veil, next time he Bays he likes to bet me ona pound, und I took him up as queek rb wink." " And it wasn't tho jack ?" 11 No ; he vhas der ace 1 I like you to oxplain how he vhas mixed oop like dot 7" For answer the Sargeant took Mr. Dunder by the hand and led him to the door and dropped him off the Btep and pointed to the river. " How you mean ?" "Go and jump in 1" •' Vhas I some haystacks ?" 11 Yes— a dozen of them 1" " Und I vha3 swindled again ?'* " The woret way." "Urn! Veil, good-bye! If somebody drags oop my body I like der papers to say I vhas poor but honest, und dot I died trying to understand how she vhas. Old frendt, farewell I"