SCENE.-PARLOR.

Tuapeka Times, Volume XX, Issue 1415, 24 December 1887, Page 2 (Supplement)

SCENE.-PARLOR.

Enter Alderman, leaning on wife's shoulder and a stick. Wife and daughter assist in settling him on chair. He seizes decanter and pours out wine.

Wipe — "Now, my dear Gobble, you really musn't ;" (tries to take glass from him.) "The doctor--"

Gobble (roars).—" Bother the doctor, confound the doctor— ah I My toe— oh my toe." (Groans.) "Get away from me. D'ye think I doa'tknow my own feelings best ?— oh-h." (Drinks wine.) "Ha 1 oh, my poor toe." (Knock without.) Daughter.—" That's Dr. Squills." Gobble. — "I won't see "him. Send him away. Tell him to go to— to." (Shrieks.) " Jer-usalem, my toe 1" (Groans.) Enter Dr. Squills: Spectacles on nose, rubbing his hands, bows to ladies.

Dr. Squills.— "And how are we to-day ? Progressing— eh— progressing no doubt. You gave our patient, (to "wife) the tincture, Mrs. Gobble, and the pills, and the solution of—?"

Gobble.—" She didn't ! She tried to ; I chucked 'em out of the window. Throw physic to the dogs— ugh!" Dr. Squills (takes up wine decanter).— " Humph I ha I ho I Very well, my dear sir— very well. If that is tbe way you treat my prescriptions— please take the poison away, Mrs. Gobble— you can't expect me to cure you. Every sip, sir, you take of that pernicious fluid creates so much uric acid and—" Gobble. — "Ah, my toe I" Db. Squtlls (spreading his hands) — "Precisely.''

Mrs. Gobble (emphatically).—" He will not take advice, doctor."

Miss Gobble (turning up her eyes). — " He is so very impatient, doctor." MRS. Gobble (dismally).—" We are worn to death—"

Gobble (shrieks) — " Ob, my toe 1" Dr. Squills.— " If you want your toe to well, Alderman Gobble, you must do as I tell yon."

Gobble (pitifully) "Well, well, I will. Help me to bed, Mrs. Gobble. I can't sit up. Doctor, lend me your arm." (Exit, leaning nu wife and doctor, and crying, •• Oh, oh, my toe.")