MISCELLANEOUS.

Tuapeka Times, Volume VI, Issue 268, 20 March 1873, Page 6

MISCELLANEOUS.

According to the Paris •* Figaro," a most terrific scene occurred in the neighborhood of Manchester. It appears that twelve yeirs ago a child of the name of Lydia Cunningham was stolen from her parents by an Irish acrobat, le sieur Mahonye, who trained her up to his profession. Miss Cunningham became the ornament of the troupe; costumed en Patagone, she used to crack flint stones on Mr. Mahonye's stomach. But vengeance was destined to overtake the childstealer. The infatuated man ventured co give a performance near Manchester. Among the spectators was the bereaved parent, who, with un cri epouvantable, recognised his daughter. He was, however, pacified for a moment by the imperturbable assurance of the acrobat that she was a Patagonian princess, [ and the performance proceeded. But the recognition had been mutual, and the young lady was only biding her time. A docile young boa-constrictor, in obedience to a signal from Miss Cunningham, seized the unfortunate Mahonye with a bound. The public uttered uu hurra formidable. The incantation continued, and the bones of the acrobat were distinctly heard to crack like dry wood. ' The Patagonian, addressing herself then to the public, coolly observed, "Where is the man named Cunningham V " Here I am," cried the man who had first spoken. "Dear sir," continued the lady, "J^. distinctly recognise you. You are m^w father. 'Go and wait for me at the Star and Garter." The public at this instance rose in a mass, flying the horrible spectacle of Mahonye eaten by the boa. The story bears a certain air of improbability, but we have in on the authority of the "largest circulalation" in France. It would be admirably adapted for a realistic drama, and the boa-constrictor would furnish a magnificent stage effect. Valtaire was, of course, incapable of the deep spiritual emotion which awes us in fche pages of Pascal, and his moral is intended for the ordinary man of the world, not for the philosopher, the mystic, or the poet. But comparing him with the writer who most nearly approaches him in many respects, we may, say that " Candide " is a better lesson to mankind than " Gulliver's Travels." Swift and Voltaire were alike revolted by the wrongs and miseries that flourish in the world, and it may be saidjn passing, that the mere fact of being acutely sensitive to grievances which only affect the mass of our fellow-creatures is something in a man's favor. Swift retiied to 'die like a " poisoned rat in a hole," gnashing his teeth and befouling the world from which he had retreated. Voltaire is equally perplexed by the spectacle of pain and injustice, but it drives him to a bolder if not more elevated conclusion. If he is unable to find relief in rapt contemplation of divine mysteries, he declines alao to give up tho game in disgust. It is a mad world, but we must make the best of it ; we had better laugh than weep, and rather fight against evils than sulk over them. Let us ridicule fools and denounce tyrants, and keep our spirits up as well as may be. Pascal says that he blames equally those who take the part of blaming him, and those who take the part of diverting themselves. " Alas!" replied Voltaire, " if you had permitted the diverting, you would have lived longer." And although Voltaire's own views became more gloomy, he stuck substantially to his principles. L<*£«g| us laugh, though the laugh has become rather a bitter one, and use our powers of ridicule to diminsh some of the overpowering mass of evil under which the world is groaning. When laughing becomes impossible, we must do such work as comes before as cheerfully as may be. "II faut cultiver notre jardin." This is his last word, and, if not the noblest conceivable, is not altogether a bad one. — "Frazer's Magazine." We take the 'following amusing paragraph from the '* Diggers Gazette," Cape Colony: — "Two amusing incidents in the march of civilization took place here last week. In the first instance Sambo was told to open a bottle champagne ; he duly untwisted the wire, and cut the string, when he was horrified at observing the cork gradually rising, as he thought, of its own accord. He held on, however, gazing fixedly with his nose just over the mystery, till the cork with a bang flew up and smote him full on that organ. With a yell he dropped the bottle and fled, and refused for a long time to be persuaded that there was nothing " uncanny " in it. In the second instance a Kaffir observing a dirty spec inside the glass of a moderator lamp, which been burning some hours, thought the simplest way of removing it would be by thrusting his finger down the chimney ! The result may be imagined." Persons who have read the novels by " Ouida" may be interested in the following clipping from an American paper, the " Cincinnati Gazette," referring to * this handler of the literary muck-rake : — " For the benefit of people who are still puzzled about the personalty of the novelist c Ouida,' it is now stated that thatmysterious personage is Miss de la Rame, a middle-aged, plain-looking London lady, who 'associates entirely with gentlemen, makes pets of several unsavoury animals, surrounds herself with curious objects, keeps irregular hours, and generally impresses one as a cross between a sorcerer and a lunatic.' It must be the woman ; the description fits."