THE COMIC HOUSEKEEPER.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 16928, 30 December 1922, Page 7

THE COMIC HOUSEKEEPER.

An American humorist lias been studying the “ ladies papers ” published in London and in the States/ He is saddened by them ; alleges that thev are too funeral in tone. The cookery pages, he says, are tragic, and the fashion pages are as dull as builders’ specifications. He would introduce a less serious vein in these solemn publications ,and suggests something like tlie following : To toll a fresh egg, ask it a. question, and see if you get a flippant reply. Trout make nice pet* for children. They are very susceptible to damp, however, and should be rubbed dry with a rough towel after every shower Home-made bread is greatly enjoyed by visitors, and can be obtained from most bakers at the same- price as the other bread they make. Hie best way to clean old gloves—throw them away and buy new. Some people are very fond of can aries. So are some cats. This should be remembered if you want your little feathered a.arm clock to wake you in the morning. His song is less muffled inside a cage than inside a cat. Try to be different Get out of the rutv Novelty is the eternal cry. Even in small, every-day things, don’t get into a mechanical, listless method. You always sweep the carpet with the same end of the broom ?—of course you do. Be different next time—sweep with the handle. A ary the monotony of cooking occasionally bv baking the soup an I boiling the roast. Get, off a tramwav car backward once or twice. Don’t be conventional. Dismiss you domestic by telephone from your husband’s office Then sta«. a wav from home until she’s gene. This method is a great preservative of beauty. To remove wrinkles from the face, and to acquire a pleasant expression, induce an unde to die and leave vou £IOO.OOO. Tn chasing a. burglar out of the house it is best to keep in front of him, a s otherwise he is likely to trip over obstacles with which vou are familiar. Do not make the mistake of going thro noli a second-storey window, as vou are likelv to break your leg. and, besides, the burglar mav not follow you. Duck out cf a. ©round-floor door or window, and run the buTglar till vou come to .i policeman. You’re safe then. \ few' small lobsters k©r»t in the bath *vilT irive the morning dip all the delightful excitement 1 of a *en bathe Sharp cinders and gravel on the floor will complete the illusion.