SPINDRIFT.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 16875, 28 October 1922, Page 8

SPINDRIFT.

Readers invited, to send in original topical paragraphs or verses for this column., which is a daily feature of the “ Star.” Accepted contributions should be cut out by the writers and forwarded to the Editor, who will remit the amounts payable. It was the observation car That sallied forth one day. Exploring suburbs near and far It ambled on its way. It braved the raging nor’-west - gale That rooted up the trees. O’er lordly hill and lowly vale It glided through the “ breeze.” By Beckenham’s sweet shady rills And avenues entrancing To Cashmere’s homes upon the hills The motor-bus went dancing. By Fendalton’s cool winding lanes And Papanui’s iences, Opawa parks. St Albans drains, And Sydenham’s residences. Where gentle cattle calmly graze In Burwood’s ample acres, By Woolston’s wild and woolly ways To Brighton’s breezy breakers. And so it rambled near and far Its own sweet will to follow— It was the observation car That braved both hill and hollow. When daylight hours much .longer grow, When hill-tops start to lose their snow. The small bouse-flv appears again And flutters on the window pane : So keep* some handy weapon nigh And swat that fly; yes, swat that fly. Your home and health you must protect . i For if this duty you neglect Each fly will raise a lively brood And they’ll contaminate your food. The truth of this you can’t deny, So swat that fly ; yes, swat that fly. Although they seem on pleasure bent, Quite innocent of wrong intent, These flies can bring you nought but h a rm; So quickly raise your good right arm Whene’er you hear one buzzing by. And swat that fly; yes, swat that fly. No grisly bear or rattle-snake Can half such fearful mischief make As these small flies that taint your meat And spread infection with their feet. So if you do not wish to die Just swat that fly; yes, swat that fly, liom refuse heap and stagnant pool They pass along to house and school, Of germs they bear a deadly crew, So, fellow men, it’s up to you 1 niake these words your battle-cry, Oh, swat that fly; yes, swat that fly! Another instance of the unbusiness like methods of Government departments occurred last Thursday, when £ Christchurch Magistrate admonishec the solicitors concerned for bringing ca?es to Christchurch when both parties in the dispute belonged to anothei town. How can our courts expect t( show a profit if they turn away cus tomers like that? London is shortly to have rubbei roads. The principal advantage claim ed is that if a motorist misses a pedes trian the first time he will still hav* another chance of catching him on th< bounce. A young man entered a local hote bar and found the barmaid in earnesi conversation with a couple of johnnies .ofter waiting for a minute or two he rapped impatiently on the counter ~ t * air Hebe turned indignantly J hat ’ s enough of that, Mi Conai Doyle,” she said, “ you don’t have tc do no table-rapping to get youi spirits here.” With women getting more and mor< into the trades we may yet see the clay when we shall have women milliners, women costumiers, women chefs and women bakers. , Some reporters are very careless. lor instance, the man who sent the story of the old woman in Naples who described a trip she made to Heaven while in a trance forgot to ask if the place is still full of West Coasters. Can Nicola do anything with the income tax? Oh, they’re great, these natural fountains, I i this land of fern and mountains. It’s surprising how one’s liking for them glows ! But of Rotorua steamy and Te Aroha dreamy, Hand the bun to happy Hanmex, Where the bubling water nows. Port News. —“ Disinfectant was put ii the drinking water yesterday.” Somebody was needing a gargle. Chinese footballers play with bare feet, says a news item. Presumably they play off scratch. News heading: “Aeroplane in the Sea.” But that’s nothing. Now if it had been a steamship in the air—that would have been worth the fuss. A paragraph in the ladies 3 pages states that cooking recipes are not of mod era origin. Perhaps this explains why indigestion its one of the oldest complaints in the world. HOW TO BECOME A GREAT BUSINESS MAN. To rise from the position of office boy you must have personality—not just a pinch of personality, but you must ooze it. All great men had personality. Noah had it, and Hamlet and Lenin. If you don’t have personality, and don’t want it, you might just as well remain an office boy or become a councillor or something. Personal appearance counts a lot with the successful business man. You must have regular features—iron grey hair, beetling brows, an under slung Jaw, thin lips like your mother-in-law; piercing black eyes which never and a chest like a boxer. Your cheeks should balance, and you should always wear your face smooth. Besides, whiskers are not really worn by the best people. You can wear whiskers in Waipukurau, but everywhere else they are taboo. It is immaterial what kind of razor yon use. only get a straight one. Close shaves are necessary to successful business man. Attention should be constantly paid to the -clothes. Never leave cigar ash on your waistcoat and never permit yourself to become dowdy. In your office use a swivel chair, one that moves all ways at once. Tt will permit you keeping an eye on the whole staff at one time. Several men who have followed the above instructions are nowsuccessful business magnates. There is yet hope for you. A correspondent in his inky say so asserts that women clerks should give up their jobs and thus give the men a chance. But are they not giving ’em a chance now--that is. a fhance L ma&e the beds and do the cooking? SINBAD.