WHY NOT?

Star (Christchurch), Issue 11763, 29 July 1916, Page 2

WHY NOT?

Tf a female duke is a duchess, Would a female spook be a spuchess? And if a male goose is a gander, Then would a male mooso be a mander ? Tf water you freeze is frozen, la the maiden you squeeze, then, squozen ? If a thing you break is broken, Would a thing you take bo token? If the plural of child is children, Would the plural of wild bo wildren? If a number of cows are cattle, Would a number of bows be battle ? If a man who makes plays is a playwright, Would a man who make? Say be a haywright? If a person who fails is a failure, _ . Would a i>erson who quails be a quailure ? If the apple yon bite is bitten, Would the battle you fight be fitten? And if . the young cat is a kitten, Then would a young rat bo a ritten ? If a person who spends is a spendthrift, Would a person who lends he a lendthrift? If drinking too much mates a drunkard, Would thinking too much make a thunkard? But why pile on the confusion? Still, I'd like to ask in conclusion: If a' chap from New York's a New Yorker, Would a fellow from Cork be a Corker? —Walter G. Doty, in " Life."