THE STORYTELLER.

Star (Christchurch), Issue 10683, 1 February 1913, Page 2

THE STORYTELLER.

THE IRRESISTIBLE BULLET.

(By B. ALLEN.)

, (Aii. Rights Reserved.] Tito Irresistible Bullet sped homo. A smile of triumph was on her lace, • for she had called 'Rene a monkey- , . faced cat arid was well beyond homing ' b'eforo 'Reno had had tinio to lire ft litting reply. , . . Somehow Rone and Tho llullefc lia'l HeV'T become friends, and .1 think the ; • idiief reason was that thoy woro both . ually matched in class at school, and ' each was in secret fear of tho other ■ outstripping her. 1 " Moukev-faeed cat!" therefore cried ~ The Bullet'and fled. On the top of tho ' ' rise where sin* stopped to pull up her ■ ■ sticks sho encountered Mr Urinees. ; . ■" Well, little girl?" said Mr Ounces, ' who never remembered children's iiames. " Good afternoon, Mr Ounces,' roplied a prim angelic-looking child to •whom the term " monkey-faced cat'

: -xnust have been unknown. * Mr Ounces was evidently impressed, for ho gave her a penny before going on his way. "Thank you very much, Mr Ouncos," said 'the angelic Bullet. ■ ' ".She" reached home in a great statn - cf deshabillo, and burst into, the kit- '• chen, whoro her mother was dispensing •,(, Afternoon tea to a friend. 1 - " Mother 1" she shrieked, displaying her trophy, "Mr Ounces gave mo a . penny I u ■ k „ ~ „ : - • "How good of him," said Mother, *'but I liopo you didn't ask for it, / Bullet, dear?" ' M No, mother, I didn t ask, replied v,' 'ffha Bullet, who'knew quito' well how Vv- to fetch Mr Ounces without asking i* ; , liixn, just as well as she know* how to i. • render 'Rene inarticulate with rage. "Mother, will it kill you i* you. Isw'allow a stone?" "Why, you haven't swallowed one, ' ' have you?" inquired Mother anxiously. Oh no, I naven't; but Mabel did Sn school to-day. We * ere, trying to see who could keep a stone in their I " mouth the longest an' suddenly Miss ■ Player told Mabel to.take the lolly out of her mouth, an' Mabel put- her hand ' up to .get it, an' when Miss Player said ' to put it on the table Mabel hadn t COt it." ■ ■ ' "What did Miss Player say? '"'""She said, 'Where's the lolly, ' Mabel ? Pj-odace ,it at once.' An' Mabel cried an' said it weiit out ot her mouth the wrong, way, an it was a ■ - stone. Miss Player said Mabel might "get penny sights! Mother, what are ■ ' penny sights? Are they^nice? Can 1 * YioXer W tem^>n?e e d n ?y offering The > (Bullet a piece of cake, and after it was . consumed she was sent outside to play -with tier little brother. > 1 Presently they both rushed into the kitchen again. ' "Mather!" they both cried, 'Air ' , (White is killing a pig. May we go and ,' bee it?" '' , . , ! '".No, certainly not!" cried their ' - -horrified mother; "fancy wanting to "go and see a horrid thing like that. " 'The Bullet looked at her mother, and decided that further pleading * "would be useless. The Bullet had a "• discerning and a crafty mind. ,I , " Well, may we play by the gum- • treesP" she asked. - h "Oh, no,"; grumbled her email brother, who did not grasp what under- ■ jay The Bullet's request. " It's how- ., \-wid over there./ I want to ploy air- - j we. can play airships by the ,■ gum-trees, silly," said The B.ullet. ' 'May we, mother?" . j ." Oh, yes," replied unsuspecting mofcher; "but don't go outside the J Off "raced The Bullet, followed rather v ' - tmwillingly by her brother. > The Bullet reached the desired spot / and sat on a knoll till her brother reached her. Then they both sat in ecstatic silenoe for a few minutes, till ■presently Th© Bullet sighed. "Don't he squeal bute-fully!" '' , r . "I 'specs they's sticking the knife 'inter him," replied her retainer. "Inter his chest," ' agreed the Bullet. " Poor ole pig." They waited till no more squeals could be extracted from the quivering air. and then they gathered gum- • bark for kindling and dutifully carried « & home, , "Did you have a good > sail m the airship?" inquired the visiter. "We didn't go up," answered . Barry; "we sat an' listened to the ole pig, squcalin' an' squealin'." , "Se did squeal," . corroborated The Bullet. , "Oh, you little heathens!" cried their mother in dismay. . The children laughed delightedly, s ' "What is heathens?" asked The Bullet. , • "Oh, horrid people, who do things like listening to a poor pig squealing,. • when they should be sorry because it is 'getting hurt." < The Bullet looked thoughtful, and repeated to herself two or three times,' fi Heathen, He-then, Heathen." After tea The Bullet ate ten pieces 5f toffee. She did not stop at ten bocause she wanted to, but because mother put away the dish. Then she commandeered paper, pen and ink, and wrote a laborious letter to her auntie. It began in a small way: "Ov." " Pot." ."Got." "and gradually enlarged it until it --ended solidly and grandly—"spot " "shot "biot." ' »—the last being illustrated in various \ positions over the page. At half-past five next morning she «nd Barry practised glees, part-songs and anthems, till an irate parent, with "a .heavy hand, secured peace. At sis X>'clock thoy commenced a' heated* discussion on the merits and demerits of sleeping with tho feet on the pillow. The discussion waxed, till Mother, popped her head in at the door and reminded them of what Daddy.would do. They remembered for nearly.-another half-hour, and then forgot everything in the delight of pulling out and pushing in a 3queaky top drawer, till The, Irresistible Bullet, truo to her name, pulled out the drawer once too often, and a mighty thud frightened Sleep, - v tvho had been, until then, hovering ibout Daddy's head, out of tho window and away up into tho Sun. Then Dad- . dv shouted, and 'Die Bullet stood, a frozen statue, in front of the wreck. ; ' Someone once that when at jchool the schoolmaster had ftaid,. " What would happen if an irresistible bullet met an impenetrable wall," and then this someone said that the heroine of these records liim of tho irresistible „ence her name. Now, occasionally Daddy proved to bo the, impenetrable wall. Ho did in this instance; and it was. a sorry Bullet that commenced the walk to school that tnorning. However, she met Mabel on " the rood, and when they came to the , .ftreek they played being wild elephants, and so, of course, the foort>ridg« was too small to bear these huge animals, they raced madly through the stream. The delightful squashy feeling in her boots afterwards quite solaced The Irresistible Bullet for her encounter with the Impenetrable Wall. Then 'Rene came, riding behind her second standard brother, and The Bullet, .well backed lip by Mabel, dared thorn to jump the narrow ditch to which the road sloped on one side. ■"Pooli! You're too scared !"• tauntad The Bullet " We're not," shouted the second standard.brother. "We'd do it if the ditch -was bigger. Anyone could jump I over a thing like that." ' <%Do it, then!" ■ "Do it, then!" taunted tho allies. The harassed brother, urged on by

SHORT AND. SERIAL.

** !■ - -n ■ I" I «!■■»!—iWUMW—f* ** 'Rone, who gave him vigorous pokes in tho back, nnd painful kicks 011 _ his calves, headed his horse at tho ditch, while* The Ballot and .Mabel watched, in fear that tho riders would actually'perform tho feat and boast for evermoro. The cunning old horse, however, knew that his way led not over the diteh, so ho stopped on tho edgo and put his head down. Amid hysterical shrieks of the purest ecstasy from tho onlookers, the jockeys slid down their steed s neck into tho rliteh. Two surprised faces changed places with four frantic feet, only to produce a perfect typhoon of yelta of derision, which enlaced in volume as the fallen ones drew themselves our, of tue ditch on to tho dry ground. At last, having exhausted thoir score of shouts, The jßullot and Mabel quietened down and began to feel some admiration and Onvy for the generous supply of mud distributed over Mlcno and her brother. They even wont so far as to help uo scrape it off, and been mo so interested in tho process that nil feuds woro forS °" We'll bo lato for school/' suddenly said 'Reno. . h . " (s'oh! I wonder what tho time ist. I exclaimed The Bullet. ' "We'll havo to fly," said Mabel. _ 1 So 'Reno and her brother again mounted their steed, and Jho Bullet and Mabel, each holding a stirrup, raced at tho.sides. The Bullet did not like being lato for school, and it was a very, timid knock that heralded her presence at the door. "Como in," cried tho teacher. , .Tho Bullet, followed by Mabel, Tommy and 'Rene, entered tho room very precisely. .Each had pulled up his and her socks in tho porch, smoothed his and her hair, and each carried a book in the right hand. Thoy oyed their teacher nervously. ""Why ivvo you all late?" came tho dreaded question. Mabel, Tommy and 'Rene looked at The Bullet, and The Bullet, like a" true soldier, stepped into the breach. "Please, Miss Player, 'Rene and Tommy fell into the ditch, and Mabel and I helped to scrape tho mud off." Now it was very evident that in scraping the mud off they had also put it on—themselves. Miss Player smiled and tho school children chortled: Tlion 'Rene remembered her wrongs # and spoke up."Please, Miss Player, they told us to." "00-oh!" protested The Bullet and Mabel, pictures of pious protest. Tommy, old enough to know that tale-telling was one of tho chief sins, nudged 'Rene hard in tho ribs j but 'Rene was too full of injured feelings to bo intimidated. " Please, Miss Player, they did," she asserted firmly. "Please " began The Bullet. "That's enough," interrupted Miss Player. "Now, Tommy did these two little girls tell you to fall into the ditch ? "No, Miss/' promptly replied Tommy, much relieved at tho form of the question. ; " Thero, see," stage-whispered The Irrepressible Bullet to 'llene; but 'Reno for once was an Impenetrable Wall, and she continued, " Please Miss Player, they said we couldn't jump .the ditch, an' we did just to show them, an' Poppet put her head down aii' we fell in, an' we wouldn't have fallen m, or tried to jump, or got muddy, or been late or nothing if they hadn't told us to." The class again chortled, and Miss Player, in the interests of discipline postponed further inquiry _ till _ after school. Her judgment,' in view of former offences, was severe, and a.sore but not repressed Bullet emerged from the school, followed by a similarly affected Mabel, and a triumphant 'Rene. " Got the strap, got the strap, got the strap," chanted 'Rone, "Cry, baby, cry! . Stick him in the eye, Poke him up the chimney, And there let him die."

"I'm not crying," snapped a red-, faced Bullet, "so you shut up." And she raced off up the road with Mabel; the refrain, "Cry, baby cry," still following them'from tile rear. When they reached tho road where 'Rene .and her brother turned off to their home The Bullet and Mabel sat down and ate 'half a bag of cherries, and then held a competition "a 6 to who could swallow the most stones. "Let's go," said Mabel, looking down the road; "here's 'Rene an' Tommy comm.' " "iet 'em," said The Bullet, darkly and briefly. Mabel fidgeted, for sho knew what to oxp-ect from the approaching two, and she had no skill in repartee. "What 'ro you goin' to do?" she inquired. " Wait an' you'll see." replied Tho Bullet, and Mabel felt hopeful. Presently 'Rene and Tommy drew up to tho corner. " Cry—babies," shouted 'Rene, still triumphant. "Cry—baby yourself," retorted Mabel," "an' tell-tale; that's what you are!" "Monkey-faced cat," cried 'Rene, remembering the insult of yesterday. Thier horse turned the corner and tho distance began to increase between the rival factions. The- Bullet stood up. Tho moment had arrived in which she intended to retrieve her prestige. "Who fell in the ditch?" she shouted. "The heathen! muddy heathen! Look at the heathen who can't stick on a horse! Heathen, heathen, hea-hea-heathon !" " Hea-hoa-heatheu!" cried Mabel, and 'Reno, thoroughly taken aback, was as before rendered speechless _ and rodo off the field of battle in a silent agony of wordlessness, while The Bullet and Mabel frolicked backwards up the road shouting their victorious cry, " Hea-hca-heathen !" till the defeated enemy disappeared round the bend. Then sho and Mabel, after earnest con-

filiation, wont into the store, and Tho Bullet, producing Mr Ounce's penny, demanded: " A penny sights, please.