AMONG THE CRANKS

Star (Christchurch), Issue 7979, 7 April 1904, Page 1

AMONG THE CRANKS

. - ♦ {By JAMS3S G'KBEN'WKKKD, "tim Amateur Oaaual.") Author of "One <xf olie Crowd," "The Prisoner in> tbe Dock," etc., eto. No. Xffl. MISS PARTRIDGE'S OTHER SELF. [AXL RIOHTB RISWtTBD.] My companion being the resident physician, as we were -walking in the garden on the women's side, drew my attention to a patient who was cosily stated and sheltered from the noonday' sun by the overhanging foliage of a chestnut-tree. We were unable to see her features, for her •wide straw hat concealed them, as with her anas folded) across her chest she sat .vith her, head bowed and apparently w»leep. is not asleep," remarked the X>o2^^Htt& a smile; "eh© is only pro--I*l^ * certain, purpose. l^^^^^^Leo round another way," he obserroi^^^Ei, as we walk, I will tell yon som^^^Vof the lady's really remarkj •• " Has she: been long an inmate of the •ejium?" I asked him. - " Bht has been here more than two years, ond is a harmless creature, and there would not be the slightest risk in permitting her to be at large, except for on« weakness ffcat possesses her, and that, I am sorry t» say, seems to have effected: a permanent Mttfemenfc. Unless closely watched, she would probably swallow something ■ injprioue—poisonous, maybe — with a view to diminishing hsr present bulk. As you may have noticed when I first directed your attention; to her, she is stout. Her present ■weight Is about thirteen stone, and it is not". likely to be less, since she continues to enjoy robust health, and has an excellent appetite. She should, you will say, be well content and comfortable under such conditions, but. you will be surprised to hear tfaat they constitute the unceasing anxiety of poor Miss Partridge's existence." . " But sorely there is nothing remarkable in that. Obesity is, I have always understood, objected to by the fair sex, the best proof being that Hh ere are in London alone at the present time at least a score of quacks who derive handsome incomes from taeir advertised 'anti-fat' nostrums." " Qalt« so ; but you have net yet heard the peculiar particulars of Miss P.'s case. .1 am afraid I shall not afford you much enlightenment by telling you that she does .{lot bemoan her Hard fate a* it affects the flesh, but the spirit. I know of ano more concise way of putting it." " But how can she do tfoe one without the oth«r?" "In this way. She repudiates the corporeity of which she is at present the spiritual proprietress, on the ground that it doe* not belong) to her. Her soul rebate against it, and is disgusted with being compelled to abide in the coarse- and clumsy tenement to which it was introduced by mistake. "That, at least, is -how Miss Partridge explains it. Oh, you must not laugu, or treat it as a joke. At all events, you nvnst refrain from doing- so in Miss P.'s 'presence, because, as I have already informed you, she takes it very seriously to heart, and it ia her one great trouble." " But. how cain« the error to occur, Doctor? And what ibecame of the ether&al „ tenant that should be in possession of the thirteen stone flesfoly premises?" "Well, you must understand, my dear sir," replied Dr 8., without a smile on his countenance, "It is in this way. As every . sensible person is prepared to believe, while vre are asleep our restless spirits take flight, to disport in regions unknown to earthly 'mortals, and the incomprehensible dreams .to which all are more or less subject are ■possibly the consequence. But our ethereal part, while away, is ever on the alert to return instantly to the body it has temporarily vacated at the slightest stir of the lat- , ter towards wakefulness. . " But, as Miss P.'s case proves, mistakes are sometimes made— rarely, thank goodness, or what a terrible muddle there would be, but it seems to be possible — one can ' imagine it happening not infrequently — that in. the hurry of swift return, a spirit may mistake its proper body and pop into "a strange one, finding it eligible for occupancy. That, as. Miss P. sincerely believes,, is what has occurred to her. As scarce need be said," continued Doctor 8., "her statement does not quite tally with the parti.culars of the case furnished to me by the ' medical gentleman who attended her previous to its being found necessary t^^lace her under restraint. "His account is much mow prosaic. I« forget the nature of the poor lady's ail- . ment, but it was on.* «vat compelled her to keep her bed* i -*«*ny months, and during ■ that time, fi «n being what is called a good figure, she developed inordinate stoutness. She had always, as I am given to understand, a tendency to the romantic, and for some time befoce she was taken ill had been. ' much in love with a gentleman who neither ; had, or pretended to hajve, any particular regard for he^. That, may have preyed on her mind. At all events, though eventually enred of her physical infirmities, she became "mentally affected, and it was while she was gradually becoming worse in the last mentioned respect, that her besetting delusion seized on her and grew. And here she is— , I wilLrintroduce you to her." . By this time we had traversed the semi- : circular path, and Miss Partridge was in view, and close at hand. She still occupied the garden-seat, bat had not altered her position. " She is trying to go to sleep," said Doctor 8., "on the off chance of the spirit in possession of her proper body being at liberty, and that and the other one meeting and arranging for a readjustment of matters." The sound of our footsteps reaching her '' eara, Miss Partridge peered from under the rixni of her straw hat in our direction, and, recognising Doctor 8., immediately roae to Bk receive him. Her age was but twenty-eight, but 'she older, and she certainly was far too f or her. height, which did not exoeed and an- inch or two. Her cheeks round as two rosy apples, her chin una doable one, and her shoulders measurement, though ample, did the girth of her waist. But, the smile with which she greeted the Doctor was a- pleasant one, and on his introducing me as an old acquaintance of bis, «he shook hand# with us both. "If you don't mind touching such a horrid little fat paw, sir," she remarkedj with * grimace, as" ■ho offered mo her pudgy palm. " Don't tell me that you are de- • lighted to do so, because, as a person of good twt» and delicacy, that is impossible, you may, if you please, go as far as to 1 tell me that after what the Doctor has said (and, of course, I know that you have been talking about me), that I am not a greater fright than you were led to expect, but please do not ,go beyond that." ji was agreeably noticeable that along with tbe fleshly encumbrance that had been imposed on her, ehe had quite a girlish voice, and spoke with a maidenly simper. ■"- "Of course, we were speaking about ▼<w," remarked Doctor 8. , pleasantly. '%- '"/you are one of my most interesting.pa-.-^-tlents, you know, and I hope you Tiill excnae the liberty I took in promising my friend hero that if ever be paid me a

visit I should introduce him to you. You aTe looking exceedingly well, I am pleased to tell you." But the resentful pout with which she received the compliment necessitated his adding promptly : — "Of course, I mean under the circumstances. Ycur eyes are bright as a schoolgirl's." The mollifying ■amendment had instant effect, "My eyes are all that belong to me, Doctor, and they are tolerably good, I believe. I should feel grateful, I suppose, that even those poor vestiges of my lormer self are preserved to me." "Of conree you 6hould feel grateful. There is no reason why you should not." " Sometimes I do not feel quite so sure of that," Miss Partridge remarked pensively. "It could not have been otherwise, I suppose. The eyee, the poet tells us, are the windows of the soul, and & soul without a window to look out at would be a poor, imprisoned thing, always pining to escape. Yet my schoolgirl eyes,_ as you flatteringly call them, are constantly revealing to me what a dreadfully uncouth.* creature I appear. H I were blind perhaps I should be happier." As Miss P. looked towards me as she made this remark, I ventured to express the hope that her precious eyesight would remain unimpaired, since there could be no doubt fas Jo her feeling ,the loss of it as keenly as anyone; more so than the generality of people, indeed, with all that made life pleasant in fair view, it must encourage her in dwelling hopefully on the happy future in store for her. She bestowed a grateful look on me, but sighed and shook her head. " There is but one happening that can give ma what I so ardently yearn for, and that, I cannot disguise from myself, is exceedingly doubtful. You must * bear in mind, my good sir, the almost miraculous combination of circumstances required to rectify the dreadful mistake that has been made. It is by no means certain, even, that the inconvenience occasioned by it is mutually shared by those who are most interested. The spiritual part properly pertaining to this vulgar individual," and she resentfully pinched the double chin, "may be only too thankful for the genteel change, and it might possibly happen that if it were able to recognise my spirit released and wandering abroad, it would meanly turn aside, so as to avoid a meeting and an explanation." "On the other hand/ remarked Doctor B. consolingly, "it must be gratifying to you to feel fully assured that your own sensitive soul Is meanwhile suffering nothing from contamination, and that should the desired exchange happily take place, your spirit part returned to its original habitation, will feel instantly at home. All the same, jou must expect it to cause you some bewilderment, almost as much, possibly, as when you discovered that you wer* possessed of another person's body.." Miss Partridge remained silent, and with her eyes closed, for several seconds, and then, with a shiver and. a slight shrug of her plump shoulders, ehe replied: "The term 'bewilderment," Doctor, does not express what my sensations were when I made that appalling discovery. Only that it dawned' on me gradually, the 6hock must have killed me." "You perfectly well remember it, no doubt?" " As well, sir, as though it were only yesterday," and with two big tears dimming her blue eyes, poor Miss P. mournfully shook her head. "It was cruelly, cruelly hard, for another as well as myself. Whait I allude to, Doctor, Is no secret to you." "No, indeed. Do you object, Miss, to my mentioning to our friend here, what it was that made the hardship so peculiarly painful to 'bear with?" With her handkerchief to her eyes, Miss Partridge intimated that she did not object. ' " There was a lover in the case, sir," said Doctor 8., addressing me. "Fortunately, perhaps, the sweetaearting had not arrived at tbe declaration stage " " There was no need for any declaration," she interrupted him. " l^rrs, sir," and she turned to me, "was lovi without words. As a gentleman, you will respect the confidence lam reposing in you. I was a faultless figure then, and, if I might believe what I was told, I was pretty as well. I suppose I must have had attractions, or lie, handsome mam, would not have sought me. Not with a silly parade of words, but- dumbly and devotedly. When we met, which was but seldom, he concealed his ardent passion under a cloak of common politeness ,ani I di-i the same, but we understood each other, . and, in blissful certainty, we did not mind waiting awhile. "It was painful to dissemble the affection we felt one for the other " (and here, for the first time, poor Mies Partridge's eyes looked a little mad). "It was excruciating for me at times, and what must he have suffered, with his great manly heart breaking for me fn secret! But a mystic influence seemed, for the time, to hold us both spell-bound, and we dared not speak, and in the midst of this trouble and anguish came the great disaster. "I well remember the night before it happened I never forgot him in my prayers^ and, on that occasion — I had seen him during the evening, and I knew by his dissembling more than ever how his Jove for me was torturing him— on that occasion I prayed for him long and earnestly, and then I fell asleep. "It may have been," continued Miss Partridge, after a pause, and with her hand to her brow, "that it was because my spirit was so troubled, that it somehow failed in. its faithful service. All that I can speak for positively is that, when I awoke, corporeally speaking, I was not' the same. I had been ill, they told nic, and a nurse was there, and she wished to give me some medicine out of a wineglass. I put up my hands to prevent her doing so, and «o caught sight of them." "They, were strange hands?" " The 'jjinda of a coarse woman, large and thick-fingered, and the arms were too large — fat and odious. I was so amazed that I could make no remark. I sat up in my bed, staring at them, anct the nurse said something soothing to me, and, with, my eyes closed, I lay back on the pillow with a hazy idea that it was all a dream. "But I was soon convinced that I was awake, though in a sort of stupor out* of whioh I could not rouse myself. But I could hear voices near me, and understand what was said. I could make out that there were two women, and one said to the other, in a half whisper : " ' The doctor said it was likely she would recover her reason about this time. It doesn't seem much like it. It is time she did if ever she will. She has been here quite three months.' " 'Is it so long?' " ' Yes. I recollect she was brought in the day after that Miss Partridge, who occupied the next bed, was brought. And Partridge, you know, was here a month to the day, and it was two months last Thursday since she was discharged.' " I remember every word the two, women whispered, but still lay stunned as it were, and with my brain in a whirl as to what it might all iaeari. My name had been mentinned, but not as', meaning me. I knew of no other 'Miss Partridge,' but they did, arid she had lain in -a bed next to mine—in an hospital bed, and the place I was in was an hospital ward ! ; And I had been there three

months, and the Doctor had said that I , should probably recover my reason. "Had I been* out of my right mind, then, ' and was Iso still?" And at that poor Miss : Partridge broke into a merry laugh. "It j did seem so droll, that I can never be serii ous. I suppose I must have laughed at the time, for when I opened my eyes, one of the nurses was bending over me and saying, 'Hush, hush!' "'But,' said I, 'will you kindly tell me •what my name is? " ' There it is,' ghe replied, pointing to a written card that hung at the foot of my bedstead.; 'That, at all events, was the n&nto-'gnFen, you when you were admitted — j Nora Grumonit.' " j And the stout little lady wag so irresistibly tickled by the mere utterance of the name, that the Doctor could not forbear laughing too. '. '' Ah ! but it was a serious matter for me," she sadly resumed, and instantly (recovering her gravity, " a terrible matter. I, of course, explained to them that they were mistaken, and that- my name was Penelope Partridge, and I had no knowledge of any person answering to the ridiculous name they mentioned, and I begged of them to tell me how I came to be an hospital patient, and why. But the only answer I got from them was that I was not- to talk, and that it would be better for me not- to ask questions. It i' was the same with the doctor when, he cam©. " He did not aippear at all surprised when I told him that I had told the nurses, as to the strange mistake that was being ma<de in respect to my, identity. He merely smiled, and 6aid he would have the matter inquired into. He had. he said, heard of babes being exchanged in their cradles, by means } of wibch malice, but he couldn't understand J how suoh a trick could be played on a person of my weight, and that in the presence of the nuarses in attendance. " He was joking, of course, humouring the whim I had got into my crazy noddle. But although he could have no idea of its serving any such purpose, that last remark of his gave me «. due to the dreadful thing that had occurred. ( ... " Because he was expected) on his visiting round the nurses had brushed any hair and made me presentable, and showed me in a hand-glass how nice I looked. I could have shrieked. L have told you of the horror I felt when I first ca-ught sight of my great fat hands, but my face! It was a caricatn re — a pantomime mask compared with my own proper features as I had last seen them reflected. " Of course, I had the haunting image on my mind when the Doctor talked his nonsense about witchcraft and the changing of children, but it set me thinking. I couldn't remember where I had read, er when, of the theory, that when we sleep the spirit that gives life to the body takes flight, to return at the moment of our waking, but now the feasibility of it was brought home to me in full force. "That was what had happened. Our beds had adjoined, mine and that of the odius Nora G-rummdt, and, through some disastrous mischance, our spirits returning at ene and the same time, had each mistaken Its mortal tenement, bo that I became her and she me. And the worst of it was, she, or rather her spirit, had gone off, with my body, leaving me hers." " And did you," I inquired of Miss Part- j ridge, wbo was again in tears, " did you make any inquiry as to what had become of her?" ; " I did," she replied. As soon as I was j well enough to leave the hospital, but could j obtain no tidings of her." "Then you really have no proof, no positive proof, I mean, that such an exchange was made?" " I have the most convincing proof in the world, sir. There was one, I knew, would recognise me, if no more than a mere resem- J blance remained of what Penelope Partridge once was. I waibed until I felt able to bear the cruel shock, if it was in store j for me, before I put it to the test, but I at last mwistered courage, and met him face ] to face. Our eyes met, and he knew me not. His gaze . was cold — cold and indifferent — and he turned away." "And ever since," struck in Dr B. cheerily, " ev«r since, Miss Partridge and I have been ths best of friends, and so we intend to remain, until the expected spiritual restitution takes place, and then, of course, she* will bid me good-bye, and I shall lose her." -